Women of Royalty of Wichita

10/20/2022

Wives, you have more power than you may realize when you speak to your husband. What effect are your words having on his heart?

Is your tone edifying and encouraging? Or is it laced with frustration and impatience?

Is your timing beneficial? Or can timing be sometimes used for leverage or to vent stress?

Does your vocabulary trend toward positivity? Or has complaining become commonplace?

Your husband is not necessarily fragile, but he is definitely human...just like you.

It's important to understand that you have access to the deepest parts of his heart (he's let you in) and what you say impacts him more than you may know.

Remember that you have the ability to give life or to destroy with your words. Use your heart-access to encourage and build up. You'll find that God will use you to help your husband grow closer to him and into the man God is calling him to be.

Caveat: a husband's words are just as powerful, but this post is simply meant to encourage the ladies. 🙂

Speak life and stay fierce,
Selena

04/23/2022

A very good read!

Jim was sitting across from me in a counseling session. His wife was sitting next to him. As we were recounting some of the hurtful things she had said over the years, I made this bold statement to her. "Inside of your strong husband lives a fragile boy", tears started to run down his face. Then, with a form of relief and excitement, he said "THAT'S IT, that is exactly how I feel but I couldn't find the words to tell her."

Even if he knew those words, he probably wouldn't tell her, or anyone for that matter. Most women don't understand that inside of their strong man lives a fragile boy.

For years, I have seen strong men on the outside become shattered on the inside and they don't know how to put into words what they were feeling. Way too often, men respond poorly to their wives, her anger and contempt crushes him on the inside then he responds poorly. Men often act out and double down with their unloving behavior then, their wives double down on their contempt.

The crazy cycle spins like a merry-go-round, neither knows how to get off it.

Our culture today has put a spotlight on women and their fragility and for good reason. Nobody questions it when a woman claims verbal or emotional abuse. Everybody rushes to their aid and don't ask questions, they just support her.

What if? What if she too said horrible things to her husband? What if she initiated the arguments and probed him to a sinful reaction where he said horrible things to her? What if he was being verbally and emotionally abused for years? Is he going to tell anyone? Would anyone listen? Would anyone care?

Can men handle verbal attacks better than women? The answer is no. The truth is, we all have a fragile person inside of us.

If you are a woman reading this, PLEASE don't get angry. Yes, we hold men accountable for their actions. I pray that you pause and look inward to see if you are crushing your man's internal boy?

Do you yell, curse, over-criticize, scowl, say things like "You never...." or "You always..."?

Do you pull away from him when he tries to show affection, hugs or intimacy? All those things crush his inner boy.

In 2nd Samual 6, David was returning from one of the most epic moments in the bible. He returned the Ark of the Lord back to Israel with a huge celebration. His wife, Michal looked on with disgust. He was dancing in the streets with joy unto the Lord. (most scholars said he took off his robe but was not naked) She looked out the window and watched him with contempt in her heart.

When he greeted her, he was hoping for affirmation and respect. Instead, he received a dose of disgust and contempt. She criticized and ridiculed him, in public. It crushed him. He was known as the strongest king who ever led Israel, the greatest warrior who ever lived, yet his wife cut him deeply. The bible says she never bore a child for him as long as she lived. We don't know if that was because he refused to be with her or if God punished her.

Other than getting affirmed by God, wives need to know that man's greatest need is the loving approval of his wife. Her trust in his ability to make the right decisions and to guide the home speaks to the fragile boy inside him. "I'm proud of you", is what he hears.

Michal hit David where it hurt the most…

How about you?

If you look back as a wife and see patterns where you cut your husband deep with words and deeds... please repent. Ask the Lord to forgive you and ask your husband to forgive you. Try to verbally acknowledge all the good in him. Write it in cards, say it with words and show it with deeds.

1st Peter encourages wives to find a different way to win their husbands over without contempt. Ask him nicely for the things you want and need. Be kind and patient. Remind him carefully. Get help from a counselor if you are at a loss.

Remember, inside that strong warrior lives a fragile boy. Other than the Lord, you have the greatest ability to help your man stay strong and healthy on the inside.

Blessings..

Matt Loehr

04/15/2022

Lovely!

04/01/2022

Wonderfully made indeed! Thank You Abba Father!

WHAT IS A WOMAN? SHE IS A HELP MEET
In the first three chapters of Genesis, we read six different names for woman—female, woman/wife (same Hebrew word), mother, Eve, and help meet (two words). Each one reveals a different aspect of who we are. Wow, we are so versatile and amazing!

The words help meet in the Hebrew are “ezer kenegdo.” And what a glorious meaning? The word “ezer” is the Hebrew word for helper. Many women think this is a subservient role. Oh no, it is powerful and amazing. Think about it. When you need help, you need someone who can do what you cannot do, someone who has more expertise than you in a certain field. In the ministry of Above Rubies we daily work on the computers and often things go wrong. I must confess I am not a computer expert and when something goes wrong, I need help. I need my computer tech. I’m helpless without him. Is his service to me demeaning? No, I am desperate for his help, and grateful.

In the same way, God created us to help our husbands in their areas of need. We desperately need one another. We are not whole without one another. My husband has strengths that I don’t have. I have strengths that he doesn’t have and so we fit together like a glove.

If I try to fulfil his role, I am wasting my time and depriving him of his anointing. He wasn’t created to fulfill my role. God has given to me as a woman the management of the home. That’s not my husband’s job. God has given him the mandate to provide for and lead the home.

“Ezer” is used 21 times in the Bible and yet 16 of those times are used to describe God as Deliverer, Protector, Rescuer, Savior, Strengthener, Protector, and Helper. And yet the amazing thing is the very first time this word is used, it is used to describe the glorious woman God created. Dear wife, and mother, as a helper, you are showing to your husband and to the world what God is like.

The word comes from two Hebrew root words:
1) To rescue, to save
2) To be strong

Today my husband is 82 years. This morning we were basking in the joy of our lives together for nearly 60 years. He was thanking me for serving him and I was thanking him for serving me. We both serve one another in our different God-given ways, and it makes life one beautiful story.

The word kenegdo means “counterpart (the part which fits another), corresponding to, part opposite.” Let’s look at some other translations to help us understand more fully:

“I will make him a helper that is PERFECT FOR HIM" (CEB).

“I will make him a helper FIT FOR HIM" (ESV and RSV).

“I will make him a SUITABLE HELPER, COMPLETING HIM” (TBV- The Berkely Version).

“I will make a helper who is JUST RIGHT FOR HIM.” (NLT, GW, and NCV). I love these words, don’t you? When God created the women, He created her “just right for the man.” She is the perfect fit.

God created man with specific strengths, but He also gave specific strengths to the woman to bring into the marriage. We don’t bring the man’s strengths, but the beautiful strengths God has given to us. Adam didn’t need another man; he needed a woman who would fit and complete him. Two pieces of a puzzle that are the same shape cannot fit together. You can only put one on top of the other which eclipses the other.

God created you to be a strong God-given helper to your husband, saving him in so many areas, but that does not make you the spiritual head of your home. It does not make you the breadwinner. That doesn’t save your husband; it destroys and pulls down your husband’s strengths.

I love this picture of God coming to the help of Israel. This is the way we can come to the help of our husbands, not like little doormats but riding in the anointing and majestic glory God has given us as we pour out our lives to build our marriages and homes.

Deuteronomy 33:26: “There is none like unto the God of Jeshurun, who rideth upon the heaven in thy help, and in his excellency on the sky.”

Be encouraged and inspired, Nancy Campbell

03/09/2022

This...this right here! My name is Mary and I am guilty of teaching false doctrine in this manner. Now, and through God's gift of grace ... I am guilty of teaching Yahweh's plan of genuine love and redeeming this gift of time with my family and loved ones! Abba Father renews, redeems and reconciles!

FALSE DOCTRINE
Did you know that you don't have to speak false doctrine to pass it on to your children? You teach it by the way you live. Our children learn more from observing our lives than from what we tell them. Do your children see the image of God in you? Do they see you as a feminine, nurturing mother, the picture God wants you to reveal as a female?

Do they see you reveling in the heart of your home and gathering your family to sit together around the table for your meals? This is the picture God paints of a blessed family (Psalm 128:3).

Do they see your sweet spirit of submission toward your husband who is your head and covering? Do they see you delighting to serve? Marriage is a picture of Christ and the church, and we certainly wouldn't expect to see the church ordering Christ around, would we?

Titus 2:3-5 describes the lifestyle God wants us to live and goes on to say that when we spurn this lifestyle that we blaspheme God’s Word. Why would it use such harsh language? Because when we don’t live the way God describes in His word, we teach a false doctrine.

Are you teaching correct doctrine to your children today?

Blessings from Nancy Campbell
In the Kingdom of Love by Arthur J. Elsley - Art Print
In the Kingdom of Love, Art Print by Arthur J. Elsley at ArtPrintsAndDecor.com

03/05/2022

This is worth learning.... sooner rather than later! Grateful that Yahweh IS Healer and Magesty!

03/04/2022