04/26/2024
1. Marriage – $35.00 – Done online. My credentials are valid but you will have to purchase the marriage certificate and get it notorized yourself depending on which state in the United States you live in, price may vary.
2. Selling Cthulhu Mythos eBooks – $10.00 – $20.00 – Send the money to my PayPal account and I promise I will send you the eBook either as an e-mail attachment or as a shared file on my Google Drive or One Drive. Do NOT share the eBooks with anyone else if I share it through Google Drive or One Drive.
3. The Cthulhu Fhtagn! Sacrament of Baptism – Meet Requirements – Requirements include vows of tithing [10% of your monthly income = (10 Cents per Dollar)], old testament kosher laws (with the exception of eating any kind of fish), and chastity until marriage (unless you serve Shub-Niggurath, which is similar to Az**el and Baphomet).
4. The Sacrament of Confirmation – Immediately Follows Baptism – Meet Requirements – The only requirement to the sacrament of confirmation is to go through the Cthulhu Fhtagn! Ritual of Baptism and to meet the pre-requirements of said sacrament. It is an acknowledgement within the Starry Wisdom Sect forum or Facebook group that you agree to follow Shub-Niggurath, Nyarlathotep, and Cthulhu for the remainder of your life.
5. The Sacrament of the Eldritch Orders – This is done as ordination of Priesthood within the Starry Wisdom Sect and that you will keep the secrets of the Nephilim for as long as you live. Violation of the oath of secrecy results in immediate excommunication.
6. The Rite of the Communion of Cthulhu – This is the Cthulhu Mythos version of Communion. It is performed to learn the will of Cthulhu among his followers.
7. The Night of the Night – This ritual is found in the Book of Eibon and is our version of the last rites. It can also be performed over those who are going through an important operation or someone who wishes it performed for them and is dying without hope of surviving in the eyes of the Starry Wisdom Sect as well as among modern doctors who have diagnosed someone with a terminal illness and they are in the final stages of that illness.
8. The Sin-Eating Ritual of Absolution – This ritual is similar to communion and absolves the person that the ritual is performed over for all of their transgressions and transfers them to the person performing the ritual who is known as a “Sin-Eater.”
9. Psychopomp Guidance For The Dead – Free -- This is a funerary ritual that is performed after the sin-eating ritual of absolution during which time the Sin-Eater guides the soul of the deceased to Heaven through a doorway of light in the sky which can only be seen by the soul and in the mind’s eye of the Sin-Eater. This is performed as a type of funeral in Scottish, Irish, and British countries among the British Isles.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO THINK THAT I AM MISREPRESENTING MY ORDINATION CREDENTIALS OR THAT I HAVE SOMEHOW GIVEN FALSE INFORMATION ABOUT THE UNIVERSAL LIFE CHURCH, TAKE A LOOK AT THE FOLLOWING URL AS IT IS THE ULC'S OFFICIAL WEBSITE:
The Universal Life Church is the world's largest online religious organization. Become ordained in minutes and perform weddings for family and friends.
