09/07/2026
Here's a short version of yesterday's sermon, September 6, 2026.
Conflict. Even the word itself can make us uncomfortable.
For many of us Filipinos, we are very good at avoiding conflict. We value "pakikisama." We don't want to embarrass anyone, create tension in the family, lose friendships, or be seen as the person causing trouble.
So sometimes we tell ourselves: “Hayaan mo na.” Let it go. Be patient. Understand them. Forgive them.
Sometimes that is wisdom. Not every disagreement deserves a fight. But sometimes what we call “keeping the peace” is actually allowing a problem to grow.
We do this in families, friendships, workplaces—and unfortunately, even in the church.
Churches experience conflict because churches are made up of people. We have different personalities, histories, cultures, theological understandings, political perspectives, expectations, and experiences.
Difference itself is not the problem. We don't have to think alike to worship together. We don't have to agree about everything to be a community. Sometimes disagreement can even help us grow.
The problem begins when avoiding conflict becomes more important than truth, justice, and the well-being of people.
Sometimes someone repeatedly hurts others or creates disturbances in the community. Everyone knows it. Everyone talks about it privately. But nobody wants to address it directly.
We say, “That's just how that person is.”
There is a thin line between patience and tolerance. Patience gives people room to grow. Compassion recognizes people's humanity. But neither patience nor compassion requires us to allow someone to continue harming others.
This becomes even more serious when abuse or harassment is involved.
Sometimes religious communities become more concerned about protecting the reputation of a pastor, leader, or institution than protecting the person who has been harmed. But the church's calling is not to protect its image. It is to protect people.
This is where Matthew 18 becomes uncomfortable but necessary.
Jesus does not say, “If someone sins against you, pretend nothing happened.”
Jesus says: "Go and talk to them."
But Jesus describes a different kind of confrontation. It does not begin with public humiliation or gathering people who already agree with you. It begins with conversation. Go directly to the person. If that doesn't work, bring one or two others. If that still doesn't work, involve the community.
The goal is restoration, truth, and accountability.
And sometimes restoration requires boundaries.
Christians sometimes misunderstand forgiveness as returning everything to exactly the way it was before. But forgiveness does not always mean restoring the same access to our lives.
You can forgive someone and still establish boundaries. You can pray for someone and still say, “You cannot continue treating me this way.” A church can believe in grace and still hold someone accountable.
Exodus 12 gives us another perspective. The Israelites had lived under Pharaoh's oppression. God heard their cries. On the night of Passover, God told them to prepare: Eat the meal. Put on your sandals. Take your staff. Be ready to leave.
God did not tell them to stay in Egypt and simply be more patient with Pharaoh.
God led them out.
There are relationships we can repair. There are conflicts we can resolve through honest conversation. There are differences we can learn to live with. But there are also situations where safety, justice, and dignity require boundaries—and sometimes departure.
Not every conflict has the same solution. That is why discernment matters.
There is a difference between a peaceful church and a quiet church.
A church can be very quiet while people are hurting. A family can look peaceful while everyone is afraid to talk about what is wrong. Peace is not simply the absence of confrontation. Biblical peace asks whether there is justice, truth, dignity, and right relationship among us.
Jesus says, “For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them.”
We often hear these words when attendance is small. But Jesus speaks them here in the context of conflict, accountability, and reconciliation.
When people finally have the difficult conversation they have avoided, Christ is there.
When someone finds the courage to say, “What happened hurt me,” Christ is there.
When someone has the humility to say, “I was wrong,” Christ is there.
When a community chooses accountability instead of protecting its reputation, Christ is there.
Sometimes faith asks us to stay at the table and have the difficult conversation.
Sometimes faith asks us to put on our sandals, take our staff, and walk toward freedom. Wisdom is knowing the difference.
And wherever God's people gather seeking truth, justice, healing, and reconciliation, Jesus promises: “I am there among them.” Amen.
