05/10/2026
A Mother’s Day Story *
A woman named Emily, renewing her driver’s license at the County Clerk’s office was asked by the woman clerk to state her occupation. She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.
“What I mean is,” explained the clerk, “do you have a job, or are you just a …”
“Of course I have a job,” snapped Emily. “I’m a mother!”
“We don’t list ‘Mother’ as an occupation, ‘Housewife’ covers it,” said the clerk emphatically.
I forgot about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high-sounding title like “Town Registrar,” but I thought, “Official Interrogator!”
“What is your occupation?” she probed.
What made me say it, I do not know! The words simply popped out of my mouth! “I’m a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.”
The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and looked up as though she had not heard me correctly. I repeated the title slowly, emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared in amazement as my pronouncement was written in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.
“Might I ask,” said the clerk with new interest, “just what do you do in your field?”
Cooly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, “I have a continuing program of research, (what mother doesn’t), in the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out). I’m working for my Masters, (the whole darned family), and already I have four credits (all daughters). Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the Humanities, (any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it!). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are much more of a satisfaction than just money.
There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk’s voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally escorted me to the door. As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants—ages 13, 7, and 3. Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model (my 6-month-old baby) in the Child Development Program, testing out a new vocal pattern.
I felt so triumphant! I had scored a point on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than “just another mother.”
Motherhood! What a glorious career! Especially when there is a title on the door!
I wondered, does this make grandmothers “Senior Research Associates in the field of Child Development and Human Relations?” Great grandmothers “Executive Senior Research Associates?”
I believe it does! I also believe it makes Aunts “Associate Research Assistants.”
Happy Mother’s Day, y’all!
*This article made the internet rounds in 2003. There was no author’s name listed, so I simply say, “Thank You!”
Arthor Unknown.
Bro. Digger