04/18/2026
Let’s talk about the “sign of peace.” If you’ve been to the Novus Ordo Mass, which most Catholics today have, you already know how this goes. The priest says something like “let us offer each other the sign of peace,” and suddenly the whole church kind of lights up. People are turning around, shaking hands, waving, doing little peace signs, sometimes even walking across aisles. It becomes this mini social moment right in the middle of the liturgy. And here’s the uncomfortable truth, that’s not actually what the “sign of peace” is supposed to be, at least not historically, and not even strictly according to the rubrics.
First off, nowhere does it say you are required to shake hands with everyone around you or throwing peace sign to aunt Judy. That’s already a modern assumption. What’s even more important is understanding that the “sign of peace” is not originally about casual greetings or human interaction in the way we treat it now. In the ancient Roman Rite, what we now call the “sign of peace” was known as the kiss of peace, and that already tells you something. This wasn’t a casual handshake. This was something symbolic, ritualized, and very controlled.
If you go back, especially around the medieval period, say, around the 13th century, you’ll see that the kiss of peace had developed into what’s called the amplexus, basically a liturgical embrace. But here’s the key detail that most people today have no idea about, it wasn’t something exchanged among the congregation. Not at all. It was something exchanged among the clergy in the sanctuary. So we’re not talking about turning to Susan from the parish council or waving at your buddy three pews back. No. This was contained, hierarchical, and reverent. It flowed from the altar, among those directly involved in the sacrifice.
And that makes sense when you think about what’s actually happening in the Mass. We are at the most sacred moment, the Sacrifice of Calvary being made present. Right before Communion, right before the Agnus Dei, right when the priest is about to elevate the Host and say “Ecce Agnus Dei”, “Behold the Lamb of God.” That’s not a moment for distraction. That’s not a moment for turning your back to the altar and engaging in social interaction. That’s a moment for intense focus, recollection, and adoration.
But what do we often see today? The exact opposite. The atmosphere shifts. The focus moves away from the altar and onto each other. And I’m just going to say it plainly, it often becomes a disruption. Not always malicious, not always intentional, but still a disruption. People feel awkward, some overdo it, some don’t know what to do, and others turn it into something casual or even silly. You’ll see exaggerated gestures, unnecessary movement, sometimes even joking behavior. And you have to ask, is this really fitting for what’s supposed to be one of the most solemn parts of the Mass?
Now, contrast that with the older practice. The kiss of peace was done quietly, reverently, and without breaking the sacred atmosphere. It didn’t pull attention away from the altar, it actually flowed from it. And there were even times when it was omitted entirely, which tells you something about its meaning. For example, in Requiem Masses, Masses for the dead, the kiss of peace is not given. Why? Because it’s considered an expression of joy and unity among those present, and in a Requiem Mass, the focus is on praying for the departed. The tone is more somber, more penitential. The Church, in her wisdom, removes that element to keep the focus exactly where it should be.
Same thing on Holy Thursday. You’d think, okay, this is the institution of the Eucharist, why not emphasize unity? But no, the Church omits the kiss of peace there as well. Why? Because of the betrayal of Judas. The “kiss” becomes a symbol of deceit in that context, and so the Church deliberately refrains from it to express sorrow and even a kind of liturgical restraint. That’s how precise and intentional the tradition is.
So when you look at all this together, it becomes pretty clear that what we often experience today as the “sign of peace” is, at best, a very loose adaptation of something much more structured and meaningful. And at worst, it can become a moment that pulls people out of prayer right when they should be most focused.
The Mass is not primarily about horizontal interaction, us with each other. It’s about the vertical, us directed toward God, toward the altar, toward the sacrifice of Christ. When that vertical focus gets interrupted, even briefly, it affects how we enter into that mystery.
So yeah, the next time that moment comes up in Mass, it’s worth remembering, you’re not obligated to turn it into a social exchange. You’re allowed to stay recollected, to remain focused on the altar, to prepare yourself for Communion. Because at the end of the day, that’s what that moment is really about, encountering the Lamb of God, not managing a round of handshakes.
