Holy Teachings of The Cart

05/28/2020

I wish somebody would put our shopping cart back 💔💔💔

05/07/2019

While our holy symbol may be missing, it's teachings are not lost:

Within the cart's great wisdom, and infinite knowledge, let there be some shared with you all as finals for the semester come to a close.

May many an 80 and an occasional 90 head your ways.

03/11/2017

Apologies for the long silence, fellow followers. After much worry and deliberation, a second round of rescue attempts has been proposed. At this point in time nothing is official, but if you have an aerial drone or any tips that can help locate The Cart, your help would be greatly appreciated.

02/27/2017

(Note: The poor image quality has to do with high radiation found in the Merrimack River, not with a certain disciples inability to take quality photos.)
As many devout followers may have noticed, a flood has been sent in an effort to test the faith of The Cart's followers. The disciples have convened and deemed the water flow unlikely to be strong enough to move The Cart in his unfailing love. However, in light of past events, several rescue teams will be prepared and on hand for potential search and recovery as the water level falls.
The disciples have stated that there is no cause for panic.
In unrelated news. Cartican City has begun a search for potential carts suitable for a full reincarnation.

02/20/2017

Help stop shopping-cart related atrocities now! Every day at least twenty-five thousand shopping carts are left damaged and abandoned, without a home. Do the world a favor, and let a shopping cart into your home now. Make The Cart proud.

02/17/2017

The Cart reminds you to never forgive. Never forget.

02/13/2017

Are you jealous of your friends' cross necklaces? Do you want a necklace to represent YOUR religion? Custom order your shopping cart necklace today!

https://www.etsy.com/listing/238050337/silver-shopping-cart-necklace-sterling

3D Charm measures 18x14mm. Chain lengths range from 14 to 30 inches (even lengths). The length shown in the photo is 18 inches. It comes beautifully gift wrapped; perfect for gift giving! Want just the charm? Choose Charm Only from the drop down box to checkout. _____________________________________...

02/10/2017

If the snow leaves you feeling down, remember The Cart. It keeps its head above the snow to remind us of its love.

02/10/2017

The Cart would kindly remind you to treat its less-holy brethren well, or it will be forced to take future action. Praise The Cart!