05/28/2026
Meditate at Eight: Ponderings
This morning began with two very different rhythms. Tori slept in and, as I type, is still stretched out and snoring without a care in the world. I, on the other hand, woke early with unexpected energy. Before I started on my first cup of coffee, I vacuumed the floor and moved the couch in search of something lost.
What did I find? Dog hair and dust (of course). A penny. A pen. A pair of glasses missing one lens (which raises questions). And one lonely screw that obviously belongs somewhere in the couch, though I couldn’t figure out where, which feels mildly alarming.
What I didn’t find was the thing I was actually looking for. It's probably still under the couch somewhere. Do you think it changed places with the screw? I don't think so either. I caught myself thinking, I hope this isn’t how the whole day goes.
But if I’m honest, sometimes this is exactly what my faith feels like. Scattered. Misdirected. Searching hard but not always finding what I hoped for.
I come looking for clarity and discover that I have more questions. I come seeking something specific from God and find forgotten things. Old dust and old memories. Small fragments that don't seem to have value. Loose pieces that suggest something may not be holding together as tightly as I imagined or hoped.
Faith can feel like that sometimes.
We search for God’s voice and instead become aware of our own clutter. We pray for certainty and discover questions. We look for one thing and stumble across ten others we've neglected.
Yet God's grace is present even there.
Because while I didn’t find what I lost, the searching still revealed something true. Under the furniture of our lives, hidden beneath the routines, there are things we rarely notice until we are forced to look closely. Dust accumulates. Pieces loosen. Important things go missing. But the act of searching wakes us up.
Maybe following Jesus isn't always about finding. Maybe sometimes it is about searching.
God, it seems, is less disturbed by our scatteredness than we are. After all, Scripture is full of people who lost their way before they found grace. Moses questioned why God was calling him. Elijah hid in a cave. Jonah fled on a ship. The disciples misunderstood just about everything Jesus tried to teach them. Thomas doubted, Peter sank,
Still, God met them all. In the dust. Among the missing pieces. Even when they felt like they were barely keeping it together.
So this morning, while Tori snores peacefully and I continue wondering where that couch screw belongs and where my missing thing went, I'm reminded that God doesn't wait for a perfectly ordered faith before showing up.
Sometimes grace meets us right in the middle of the mess beneath the couch.
Prayer: Lord, you see every scattered part of me—the worries, the unfinished thoughts, the misplaced priorities, and the things I can't seem to find or fix. Thank you for meeting me anyway. When my faith feels cluttered or distracted, help me trust that you are present in the searching. Hold together the pieces that feel loose, and remind me that I am never lost to you. Amen.