07/08/2020
Friends of the Lehi Skyridge Seminary,
As many of you will be aware of, our community suffered a loss this week to su***de. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has provided some wonderful resources for parents and students that provide comfort and guidance. We feel this may be helpful as you have discussions in your family.
The Church's video "Su***de Prevention: Choose to Stay" is a brief but powerful message you and your student could watch together:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPhCJaBqh74
The Church has a portion of its website dedicated to a conversation about issues surrounding mental health: https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/get-help/su***de?lang=eng&cid=rdb_v_su***de_eng.
The series of videos on that page may be particularly helpful, and can be found at:
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/videos?lang=eng
In that series of videos, Elder Renlund makes some important comments about su***de:
"There's an old sectarian notion that su***de is a sin, and that someone who commits su***de is banished to hell forever. That is totally false. I believe [that in] the vast majority of cases we'll find that these individuals have lived heroic lives, and that that su***de will not be a defining characteristic of their eternities."
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/videos/understanding-su***de?lang=eng
"It's completely safe, completely safe to ask someone if they're having suicidal thoughts, or if they're having thoughts of harming themselves. … If they pause and say, "maybe," … this is now beyond that they need to read the scriptures or pray more fervently or exercise more faith."
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/videos/talking-about-su***de?lang=eng
Sister Reyna L. Aburto said this specifically about her experience with her father's su***de in the October 2019 General Conference:
"[My] own father died by su***de many years ago. His death was shocking and heartbreaking for my family and me. It has taken me years to work through my grief, and it was only recently that I learned talking about su***de in appropriate ways actually helps to prevent it rather than encourage it. I have now openly discussed my father's death with my children and witnessed the healing that the Savior can give on both sides of the veil."
She also encouraged:
"Let us follow the Savior's path and increase our compassion [and] diminish our tendency to judge … Listening with love is one of the greatest gifts we can offer, and we may be able to help carry or lift they heavy clouds that suffocate our loved ones and friends. …
"Your struggles do not define you, but they can refine you. …
"Let us all remember that our Savior, Jesus Christ, '[has taken] upon him [our] infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know … how to succor [us] according to [our] infirmities.' He came 'to bind up the brokenhearted, … to comfort all that mourn; … to give beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.'
"I testify to you that 'thru cloud and sunshine' the Lord will abide with us … [and that] our 'afflictions [can be] swallowed up in the joy of Christ.' I testify that Jesus Christ will return to the earth 'with healing in his wings.' Ultimately, He 'shall wipe away all tears from [our] eyes; and there shall be no more … sorrow.' For all who will 'come unto Christ' … the 'sun shall no more go down; … for the Lord shall be [our] everlasting light, and the days of [our] mourning shall be ended.'"
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2019/10/31aburto?lang=eng
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland delivered an important address to those struggling with issues of mental health in October of 2013. He said:
"However bewildering this (the presence and experience of mental illnesses) all may be, these afflictions are some of the realities of mortal life, and there should be no more shame in acknowledging them than in acknowledging a battle with high blood pressure or the sudden appearance of a malignant tumor."
He described Major Depressive Disorder (MDD, or simply depression) as "an affliction so severe that it significantly restricts a person's ability to function fully, a crater in the mind so deep that no one can responsibly suggest it would surely go away if those victims would just square their shoulders and think more positively—though I am a vigorous advocate of square shoulders and positive thinking."
Elder Holland gave this advice as well: "So how do you best respond when mental or emotional challenges confront you or those you love? Above all, never lose faith in your Father in Heaven, who loves you more than you can comprehend. … In preventing illness whenever possible, watch for the stress indicators in yourself and in others you may be able to help. …
If things continue to be debilitating, seek the advice of reputable people with certified training, professional skills, and good values. … If you had appendicitis, God would expect you to seek a priesthood blessing and get the best medical care available. So too with emotional disorders. Our Father in Heaven expects us to use all of the marvelous gifts He has provided in this glorious dispensation."
His final encouragement brings can bring immense comfort to our Skyridge Family during this time of loss: "Whatever your struggle, my brothers and sisters—mental or emotional or physical or otherwise—do not vote against the preciousness of life by ending it! Trust in God. Hold on in His love. Know that one day the dawn will break brightly and all shadows of mortality will flee. Though we may feel we are 'like a broken vessel,' as the Psalmist says, 'we must remember, that the vessel is in the hands of the divine potter. Broken minds can be healed in just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed. While God is at work making those repairs, the rest of us can help by being merciful, nonjudgmental, and kind.
"… Until that hour when Christ's consummate gift is evident to us all, may we live by faith, hold fast to hope, and show 'compassion one of another.'"
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2013/10/like-a-broken-vessel?lang=eng
Our thoughts and prayers are with those affected and hurting in the wake of this loss. During this challenging and uncertain time, we are grateful to bear witness of the power that flows from the Atonement of Jesus Christ, and testify that there is hope and healing we can gain as we turn to Him.
