Lyonsville Congregational United Church of Christ

04/21/2023

April 21, 2023

You Do Not Answer

Mary Luti

Why have you forsaken me? I cry by day, but you do not answer; and by night, but find no rest. - Psalm 22:1-2 excerpt (NRSV)

Some people think that the goal of spiritual practice is to experience God with them and within them. But not everyone feels God’s presence, no matter how much they want to, no matter how hard they try to.

Many faithful people feel only the ache of absence. They know a God who is silent, hidden, and distant—so much so that it can be painful for them to be around people for whom God is close and warm.

There’s an old saying, “If God seems far away, guess who moved?” You’re supposed to answer, “Not God.” You’re supposed to believe it’s your fault.

But whoever thought that up never read the psalms. Jesus, who probably loved saying “Surely goodness and kindness will follow me all the days of my life” as much as we do, didn’t pray Psalm 23 on the cross. He prayed Psalm 22: “I cry to you, but you do not answer.” I don’t think Jesus moved, do you?

The Christian life isn’t about feeling feelings or having “powerful” spiritual experiences. Baptism ushers us into a life of greater depth than that—a life of faith. And at some point in every life, faith is a journey through the desert and the shadows.

If you don’t feel God right now, you’re not failing. You’re not a second-class Christian. You have a gift. A hard gift, but a gift all the same. It’s your heartache—faith’s heartache. And like nothing else, it can lead you straight to the heartache of others, to neighbors whose abandonment is human, not divine. For them you can be company. With them you can outwait the night until the Coming Day.

Prayer

Hidden One, they say you are still speaking, but if it isn’t to me right now, let me at least trust that you are as close to me as the suffering, as audible as the cry of the abandoned. Let me find you with them.

04/15/2023

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how to come back from the dead
How to Come Back from the Dead
by Molly Baskette | published on Apr 15, 2023
Supposing him to be the gardener, Mary said to him, “Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away.” Jesus said to her, “Mary!” She turned and said to him in Hebrew, “Rabbouni!” – John 20:15-16 (NRSV)

When I was in chemo a decade ago, I didn’t want to watch all my long red hair go down the drain, so I cut it all off the first week of treatment. My four-year-old put the disembodied ponytail in a blue bowl on top of her dresser. Every once in a while, she would take it out and run her fingers through it protectively. I think she had some idea that it could go back on my head someday. I watched her and cried through my two remaining eyelashes to think that there was a possibility she might grow up without a mother.

She didn’t know then that there is no putting hair back on a cancer patient. Some things, when they’re done, are done. There’s no unhearing certain words, words like, “I don’t love you anymore and I want a divorce,” or words like, “it’s cancer,” or words like, “there was nothing more we could do.”

How do we come back from these deathly doings? The reality is there is no coming back from the dead. But we can go on. And we will be changed, just as Jesus was changed in moving on from death, unrecognizable even to his best friend Mary.

When my head’s peach fuzz bloomed with the end of chemo, my kids and I went to a local park and brought the ponytail. We each took a hank of hair, waited for a breeze, and set it free, perhaps to line soft nests for baby birds. But it didn’t float. It kerplunked into the field in globby clumps.

And then a holy, hilarious thing happened. As we moved away, we noticed two little sisters playing nearby. One of them discovered a clump of hair, and screeching with delight, they gathered all they could find into massive fluffy piles.

My family and I just looked at each other and started laughing. None of us had the heart to say anything to the girls. There are some things you can only learn, should only learn, when it is time.

Prayer
God, innocence is good. So is the wisdom from having passed through death. Raise us from all our traumas to be as radiant and joyful as Jesus the Gardener. Amen.

About the Author
Rev. Molly Baskette is the lead pastor of First Church Berkeley UCC and the author of books about church renewal, parenting, spiritual growth and more. Sign up for her author newsletter or get information about her newest book at

Molly Baskette ​​ Progressive Christian pastor. Incorrigible optimist, despite all the facts. ​Church renewal cheerleader. Transformation ju**ie. Cancer survivor, author and mom. Keep up with...

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