10/21/2026
https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1CX9NuDSwU/
A great reminder to have the hard conversations, and enforce the consequences because it absolutely could be life saving!
“What do you think I’m gonna die, Mom? Chill.”
That’s what my son Jaden said to me. A week later, he was gone.
He’d been in an accident with a friend just two weeks before. We talked every day in those next two weeks about the dangers of riding with other teens. I told him he wasn’t allowed to get into anyone’s car without my permission. I grounded him. I explained why.
He was standing at the refrigerator when he told me to chill. I can still hear him like it was yesterday.
He got into a car with three other teenagers. They went hilltopping on the back roads around Rolling Hills, driving fast enough to make their stomachs drop.
One of the boys was recording a video. You can hear the kids. “Go faster, go faster.” You can hear her respond that she’s got the pedal to the metal.
I’ve watched that video over and over. You never see Jaden. You never hear his voice.
The car crashed. And he was gone.
I’ve spent six years thinking about the decisions made that day. By every child in that car. Including my son.
Teenagers want to fit in. They want their friends to think they’re fun. And when you put four teenagers together in a car, you’ve got four kids who are still learning how to make good decisions, all influencing each other.
Sometimes one of them knows something is a bad idea, but nobody wants to be the one to say it.
That’s what we have to teach our children. Not just how to drive safely, but to have the courage to speak up when someone else isn’t.
And we have to give them consequences when they make dangerous decisions.
I know it’s hard. Taking away their car means driving them to school, taking them to practice, and listening to them complain. It’s inconvenient. It’s exhausting.
Do it anyway.
Talk to your children about what can happen. Not just when they’re driving, but when they’re passengers. Explain why the rules exist. And remember that the way you drive is teaching them, too. We can’t tell our kids not to speed while we’re driving 80 miles an hour because we’re running late. They’re watching what we do, not just listening to what we say.
Today, I visit schools with Eva, the young woman who was driving the car that day. We stand together and tell teenagers what happened.
Eva knows what it’s like to make a decision that changes lives forever. I know what it’s like to lose a child because of one.
I don’t want another mother to know what that feels like.
During National Teen Driver Safety Week, I’m asking parents to have the conversations their teenagers don’t want to have. Set boundaries. Follow through with consequences. Teach them that saying no isn’t weakness.
It takes courage to be the one who speaks up when everyone else is going along.
They may roll their eyes. They may tell you to chill.
Keep talking.
