Outside The Gates Ministries

01/01/2025

10/15/2023

Marie and Bob are ln prayers for all of our hundreds family and friends who are feeling the deep emotions of these critical times. We are especially praying for Israel, who are facing unbelievable grief from the recent circumstances of unbelievable proportions .

06/28/2023

Praise the Lord for my and Marie’s daily blessings. The Holy Spirit is oh so present in our prayers for our children and grandkids; and the hundreds of friends. Our heart grieves with the possibility that any one of them could miss the privilege of heaven. With a deep love for all of you we send our love and prayers.

04/08/2023

Happy Easter to all our families and friends during this Holy Season. Our daily prayers and deep faith is that these Holy Easter Truths will be personally embraced by all those we love and pray for daily.

Bob and Marie

03/05/2023

1. If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality.
2. If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.
3. If I get dementia, don’t argue with me about what is true.
4. If I get dementia, and I am not sure who you are, do not take it personally. My timeline is confusing to me.
5. If I get dementia, and can no longer use utensils, do not start feeding me. Instead, switch me to a finger-food diet, and see if I can still feed myself.
6. If I get dementia, and I am sad or anxious, hold my hand and listen. Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded.
7. If I get dementia, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.
8. If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.
9. If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past.
10. If I get dementia, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
11. If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.
12. If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.
13. If I get dementia, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.
14. If I get dementia, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.
15. If I get dementia, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.
16. If I get dementia, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.
17. If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot.
18. If I get dementia, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original place.
19. If I get dementia, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
20. If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.
21. If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.”

ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇ in honour of someone you know or knew who has dementia. In honour of all those I know and love and lost who are fighting Dementia/Alzheimer’s.💕

11/13/2022

Watching the Hallmark Movie (yes I’ve turned in one of those folks!) - and it was called “Our Italian Christmas Memories.” It is about a man with Alzheimer’s and he goes to the doctor for a second check-up.

The doctor asks him a serious of questions:
1. What is your birthday
2. When were you last here? (Really - I could not tell anybody when i was last there. You have records - check them!)
3. The doctor told him, “I asked you a question and told you to remember it for when you came back in. Can you tell me that question?” Are you freaking kidding me? I cannot remember what I went into the next room for - much less what someone asked me months ago.
4. How many nickels are in 60 cents. I’m still counting fingers to make sure I am right.

Granted - I am not making light of this - but I am saying not being able to answer these questions does not mean you have Alzheimer’s. What they are trying to measure is the progress of the disease. I learned you never fully are 100% sure until they do a biopsy of the brain but there are signs.

At the evaluation with Mom - Dad and I took her to a week respected clinic in Atlanta - it was an eye opener when the doctor asked her to draw a clock face, and put the numbers 1-12 on the face - and then to add the hands on the clock for a certain time. That was when I knew 100% she had it. I Kind of knew it before this time - but she put all numbers 1-12 in the spot you normally saw the 1-6.

If you are struggling with a family member with Alzheimer’s I’d be happy to be there to talk with you. It is a horrible disease and so unfair - and it’s is something so very hard to understand.

JONNE CRICK

05/20/2022

Share with us - what is one of the hardest things you have experienced with your loved one with Alzheimer’s?

05/14/2022

Caregivers are a lifeline when we are caring for a family member. When you eventually lose your loved one to heaven’s gates - you also lose those whom you became very close to.