08/21/2026
If you’ve read almost anything coming out of Tifereth Israel lately, you’ve probably heard that the High Holidays are the busiest time of the year around here. Behind the scenes, there are timelines and spreadsheets, programs and mailings, graphics and emails, and, in my case, one very meticulously maintained High Holiday timeline that helps keep all of us on track.
As the days pass by, the items on my timeline get checked off one by one. This week, one has taken up much of my attention: the Yizkor Book.
For the past several weeks, I’ve been helping congregants make sure their Yizkor listings are correct. This week has been spent assembling, cross-checking, editing, and re-editing the book itself. More than 3,700 names need to be checked and placed correctly. This task is not simply administrative.
Throughout the year, I am often the person who sends our death notices to the congregation. There is always a moment before I hit “send” when I am especially aware of what that email means. A family is already grieving, and friends and loved ones may already know. But once I click that button, the news travels through our community. Someone recognizes the name. Someone realizes they need to make a phone call. Someone remembers a conversation, a shared meal, or a seat in the sanctuary. A death that belonged to a smaller circle suddenly becomes a loss our community shares.
And then, we remember. We say Kaddish. We observe a yahrzeit. A name enters our records and, eventually, our Yizkor Book.
Perhaps that is why, when I work my way through those thousands of names, I have developed a habit of trying to actually notice each one. Even if only for a second, I try to recognize that every name belonged to a person.
Tifereth Israel has been part of this community for more than 120 years, and some of the yahrzeits in our records go back generations. As I work through them, I wonder about the people behind the names. Who were they? Who once opened a Yizkor Book specifically looking for them? Is there still someone who says Kaddish for them? Someone who sees their name and immediately remembers their face, their voice, or a story about them?
During the High Holidays, hundreds of people will open our Yizkor Book looking for particular names. They will find parents and grandparents, spouses, siblings, children, and friends. Those names hold entire lives and relationships that cannot possibly fit on a printed page.
But there will also be names no one is looking for anymore. People whose families have moved away or passed on, whose stories may have faded over generations, whose names could easily become just another entry in a database. Those are the names I find myself thinking about most.
I may not know their stories, what they cared about, or who once loved them. But for the brief moment their name is in front of me, I can notice them. I can remember that this was a person who lived and mattered to someone, and whose name has been entrusted to our community to carry forward.
More than 3,700 names begin to feel less like 3,700 records and more like 3,700 people.
Maybe that is part of what Yizkor asks of us.
A death notice marks a moment when a community begins to carry a loss together. Yizkor reminds us that our responsibility to remember does not end when the emails stop, the shiva chairs are put away, or even when the people who knew someone personally are no longer here. We cannot preserve every story or personally know every person whose name has been passed down through generations.
But we can continue to say their names.
After nearly a decade of creating these books, I still can’t bring myself to treat them as just names on a page.
I hope I never do.
Shabbat Shalom,
Amanda Cohen