08/14/2026
Here on my page, and across my socials, as well as at various events, at conferences and festivals, and in my own courses and classes…I share my love and passion for Welsh myth, lore, and magic.
Many of you comment on my videos, or approach me after my talks or classes to tell me you admire my joy, my passion, my humour, and I have been so touched to hear that I have inspired people in a variety of ways.
But can I be really honest for a second?
All of the joy, whimsy, passion, and humour is one of my methods of fighting against things that, truly, terrify me at present. Visibly living joyfully can be an act of resistance in a world that demands people like me shut up and hide and in the shadows.
I’m terrified of the direction we’re heading here in the UK when it comes to bigotry and intolerance.
I am trans. You cannot separate that aspect of my lived experience from who I am on a broader scale. It has influenced who I am, and altered the way I move in the world.
No, I’m not “one of the good ones”. I’m just a trans person. Living my life. But every day I wake up and see yet another segment from a news show, or radio show where people like me are discussed as though we’re some monsters lurking amongst our communities.
I ask all of you who have watched my videos, interacted with me in person, had a chat with me at an event…do I come across as a dangerous monster to you?
This week new guidance was set out, stating that trans people should not use any facilities that do not line up with their s*x assigned at birth. If we want to go to the toilet, or want to use a changing room at the gym, we MUST use gender neutral facilities. Or just not go at all.
Which is rather ridiculous when you consider…many businesses, especially here in the UK, do not have a gender neutral option. They might have an accessible toilet, but many of those are locked by radar keys, and shouldn’t we prioritise keeping those spaces open and ready for disabled people to use?
With this new guidance, what I’ve experienced lately is a tidal wave of “debates”. These debates make it easier to dehumanise trans people, to see us as some hypothetical boogey-monster rather than real, living people.
We’re not just some hypothetical fodder for debate. We’re people. I am a child of a loving mother, a sibling, an aunt, a fiancée to my love. But when we have these constant looping “debates”, we strip people of all those human aspects and transform them into one thing…a scary creature worthy of debating about.
I’ll be honest, I haven’t been able to safely, comfortably, and easily use a public toilet in years. Every single time I’m out in public…having a fun day out with friends…I avoid going to the toilet as much as I can. Can you imagine that? Spending a whole day out, from morning until night, wandering around shops and cafes with friends…but then not being able to use the toilet? How uncomfortable would that be?
Well, that’s just the day to day life of many trans people today.
Trans women like me are told we shouldn’t use the women’s toilets. But we’re also unsafe in men’s toilets. So the alternative is either try and track down gender neutral facilities, use facilities set out for disabled people, or just not go at all.
With all these ongoing debates lately, we also never know when someone is going to launch themselves into a flurry of transphobic attacks against us. I’ve had people try and “debate” trans issues with me when I’m just sat at a stall trying to sell my books. Unprompted, people will just launch into these “debates”. I’m not allowed to just live in peace without having to expect someone deciding to question whether or not I should be seen as a human being.
So when you see me at pagan events…imagine how uncomfortable I probably am inside. Imagine how much anxiety is coursing through my body at any given moment. But I don’t let anyone see the fear or anxiety I have. I get up onto a stage and I present my talks. I wander around and happily chat to folks who tell me they like my books or my videos.
I don’t let the scary nature of this current transphobic climate stop me from living joyfully and sharing my passion.
But I truly want people to understand, especially now with how much things are escalating, just how much effort it takes to stay positive in a world that seems intent on painting you as some monster.
So…a plea to my lovely friends on here:
When you see these “debates” unfolding on TV or in person…stop thinking of trans people as this impersonal concept. Think of me. Think of the trans people you know in real life. Because that’s who you’re actually “debating” about.
Remember that these debates and the transphobic attitudes that are growing today will not just affect trans people. If you’re a woman who doesn’t fit society’s standards of what it means to be “feminine enough”…then you too might be attacked in a bathroom for simply existing. It’s already happened to many women who are deemed too masculine looking, have PCOS or facial hair, or who have deeper voices. This gender policing affects us all.
If you’re an ally to trans people, it’s time to get louder with your allyship. It’s time to put your money where your mouth is. It’s time to fight for the rights and dignities of trans people.
Above all else: Remember, at the heart of these “debates” are real people. We’re not a hypothetical. And these “debates” simply give violent bigots permission to dehumanise us even more than they already do. Which can and has lead to violence.
Friends, I’m terrified. But I refuse to stop living joyfully. I refuse to hide. Please don’t let the media convince you that weird little geeks like me are the threat they say we are.
Diolch am ddarllen | Thank you for reading.
