03/12/2021
Thank you to the Stoler Family for sponsoring Shabbos meals this week in memory of Susan Zeiman.
I vaguely remember the first time I took a selfie; it was sometime during Obama's second term as POTUS. I felt uncomfortable doing it. Until this point, if I wanted a picture of myself with a friend, I’d have to find a stranger, hand her my phone, and ask, “would you mind snapping a picture of us?” Now, all that would change. No third-party was needed to help create memories. In fact, I didn’t even need a friend in the picture anymore either. I could just snap pictures of myself in front of interesting places, post them, and this would be considered socially normal.
It seemed rather egotistical, and understandably, I was hesitant to step into the selfie world. But once I saw a photo of (then) President Obama at Nelson Mandela's memorial service taking a selfie, I realized that the time had come. Snap.
This was seven years ago. Since then, social media has made our world feel much smaller and more connected. But this connected world often feels like a bunch of individuals who are looking out for themselves and sharing their happy moments with the world hoping to get likes. Is that real connection? Is that community?
To begin to answer this, I’d like to quote the man who originally pushed me into the selfie taking culture. At a self-hosted summit Obama made the following comments.
“One of the weird things about being president is that I found people were no longer looking me in the eye. They approach me either like this, or like this” Obama said mimicking phone-waving selfie-takers.
“To see young people organizing in states all over the country through social media is amazing. But blocking yourself from having a conversation or seeing somebody and recognizing them and listening to them because you are so busy trying to get a picture ... I think, in some ways, [you’re] contributing to what separates us…”
In our parsha, Moshe descended from Mt. Sinai to a disjointed Jewish people. He immediately began to reestablish community in two ways. First, he rallied everyone to contribute towards the building of the Mishkan (tabernacle). This national building project required everyone’s participation, whether through talented artisans building the intricate structures, or through the collective contributions of precious metals needed as materials. It follows that during the building of the Mishkan there is a rare break from any complaining or rebellions amongst the desert wandering Jewish people.
The second unifying aspect Moshe introduced was Shabbat. Shabbat is the antidote to self-centeredness. It’s the day we put aside our projects, meetings, work phone calls, and strivings, to celebrate together the things which aren’t about me, but rather about us.
Community is a central factor of Judaism. Many of our holiest prayers cannot be said individually. We pray in the plural for the redemption of our exiled and for the healing of our sick. The focus is on including others in our mindset.
Anyone who spent time over the past year in quarantine is very aware that, time for oneself is important, but being isolated by yourself is not fun, and even damaging. We need the presence of other to help us grow, to make real memories, and to navigate difficult times. Our happiness as a person doesn’t lie in the self, it lies in the strength of our communities, in our relationships, in what we provide to others, and in what we are given.
This leaves us with big questions - are we doing enough to build our in-person relationships and community? Are we making something like Shabbat with its built in ‘smartphone free zone’ a regular part of our lives? And, thinking beyond ourselves, are we seeking out and inviting others into your community? Let’s talk about these questions and strengthen our individual and collective selves!
