04/11/2020
A year ago if someone would have told us that the entire world would be hit with an unknown virus....that we as a nation would be forced to come to a halt, that we would be quarantined to our homes and we would be wearing masks to go out for provisions...we probably would have laughed. Really, it sounds more like a good sci-fi story than possible reality.
And yet, here I sit. I’m in my little craft area, going on almost a month of quarantine, and I just ate about 6 pieces of laffy taffy out of my hidden candy stash as I listened to my kids throw down over Minecraft upstairs. True story.
So, tell me...How these past few weeks have been for you? I will not lie, this homeschool mom has felt the slam of the brakes hard this time. The constant going here, moving there, doing this, going to do that...the schedules, the to-do lists, the things that I participated in that I allowed to define me...a lot of it is gone.
Being a homeschool family you would think that something like this would not effect us, but the reality is, it has been a completely different way of doing life.
That doesn’t mean it’s all bad. We have moments that I know we would have otherwise sailed past without even stopping. Having weeks where we have no choice but to anchor ourselves at the house has had its perks. Daddy is working from home, impromptu card games and time for playing outside, snuggles and laughter...those are the times I know that I will look back at later and be grateful.
Yet, there are also moments that creep up on me when I least expect it. Moments when I look around and feel the walls closing in, the house is a mess, the kids are SO DONE with staying home, worrying about money, wondering if we will run out of TOILET PAPER(?!), oh no....we have to go to the store AGAIN.... (and who knew that going to the store would be such an adventure)....then hearing the news reports on an invisible enemy that is just waiting to attack my family. It can make you take a hot minute.
I can feel the fears start to run up my spine. What if Owen gets sick, did we wash our hands, should we do this, what if that....and then the spiral happens.
Isn’t that how it happens?
Without even realizing it I let my mind become overwhelmed with all the possibilities over this virus. A virus. Something that I myself have never seen or experienced. But others have, and smart folks are saying that it’s real and we need to pay attention. That our lives and the lives of our loved ones depend on it. And just like that...I put my trust in man...even when I am told that there is a virus that I may never see with my own two eyes, that they are not sure where it came from, or even how to stop it, but I need to proceed with caution....and I listen without hesitation.
The truth is, I believe that an invisible adversary has been prowling about this earth for much longer than this virus, waiting to devour me. And I also know that my Father in heaven has already won the battle and is directing my path. And honestly, I have come to realize there are times I never let this knowledge make me skip a beat. Wow. But, I will let a virus shake me to the core?
But wait...I’ve never seen God or the Devil, so how can I know they are real? I can’t tell you what he looks like. I can’t tell you how it all works...so how can I put my faith in something I cannot see with my own two eyes. Because even though we as humans love the saying, “I’ll believe it when I see it,” we just don’t practice that very well. We put our blind faith in many things. Things we can’t be sure of, we can’t see, that we just assume to be correct. We don’t have to see something to know it’s true. This virus....I don’t have to see it to know it’s there.
The same is true for God.
I have to wonder how the disciples felt the day after Jesus died. His mother? Mary and Martha? The woman at the well? All the people who had put their faith in him, and now—he was gone. They had dropped their world as they knew it to follow him and now in an instant, everything changed. He had even told them that it was going to happen...and they still had the wind knocked out of them. Some had hidden, some lied, some bravely carried the cross, some were there at the end to bury his body. All of them were afraid, confused, and lost. But, that was not the end of the story, and a lot happened in three days.
So, what then. What do I do? I have to choose to let my faith be bigger than my fears. Not just in the situations where it feels like this world is spinning out of control, but also when I feel the anxiety build as I hear that, yes, we are going into another week of being still. Or when my kids ask if they can play Minecraft....again.
I want to walk confidently, to be alert, not conformed to this world, holding onto the knowledge that the Lord is with me and guards me. To remember that I already know (because He told me!) that any obstacle that Satan uses to derail me, not even a worldwide pandemic....can separate me from the love of Christ.
I heard a lady say this morning that you can have happiness, but if you put “un” in front of it you have “unhappiness”. A totally new word with a whole new meaning.
However, You can’t put an “un” in front of JOY. You can’t “unjoy”.
Maybe that’s why Paul tells us in Philippians 4 to rejoice always. Because happiness and joy are two different things. Happiness is a state, joy is a feeling. Happiness is contingent on how I feel. Joy has nothing to do with how I feel, but what is true.
The truth? Faith is not the absence of fear. Faith is my reaction to fear. So, today I choose faith. I choose joy. And, tomorrow I’ll choose it again.
Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:4-7
