06/12/2022
HOW TO FACE THE FEARS THAT RUINS RELATIONSHIPS - by rick warren
We learned that all misunderstanding between men and women started right in the time of Adam! Between husbands and wives, boyfriend and girlfriends, all the confusions, all the conflicts, all the jacking for power and position, who’s going to be in control and who’s gong to handle this and that… That’s all goes back to this situation in here, SIN…
Would you like to move from competition to cooperation in your marriage? Where you’re not fighting each other, but you are fighting together against other things because you’re on the same team?
HOW DO YOU DO THAT? WHAT IS THE ANTIDOTES IN A RELATIONSHIP THAT RELEASE THESE 3 FEARS?
THAT CAUSES ME DISTANT, DEFENSSIVE AND DEMANDING IN RELATIONSHIP.
THERE IS ONLY ONE ANTIDOTE TO THE FEARS: IT IS LOVE!
- LEARN TO LIVE IN GOD’S LOVE! I must learn to live in God’s love!
I JOHN 4:18a “Wherever God’s love is, there is no fear, because God’s perfect love drives out all fear.”
So, you want to get rid of fear in your relationship? You got to get God’s love there. You want to get rid of fear in your career? Get God’s love there. “Wherever God’s love is, there is no fear, because God’s perfect love drives out all fear.” The opposite of FEAR is not FAITH. The opposite of FEAR is LOVE. WHEN YOU INVITE GOD’S LOVE ON THE FRONT DOOR OF YOUR HEART, FEAR GOES OUT AT THE BACK DOOR! BECAUSE FEAR AND LOVE CAN’T LIVE IN THE SAME HOUSE.
WHENEVER YOU ARE AFFRAID, YOU ARE NOT BEING LOVING. BECAUSE PERFECT LOVE, CAST OUT ALL FEARS.
You see: This is the result of fear:
I JOHN 4:18 “It is the thought of punishment (negative consequences) that makes a person fear.”
How do I learn to live in God’s love? YOU DO 3 THINGS. AND IF YOU DO THESE 3 THINGS, IT WILL TRANSFORM YOUR RELATIOSHIPS! THERE ARE THREE DAILY CHOISES!
You may have been married 40 years, 50 years… it will till transform your relationship.
I. EVERYDAY I SURRENDER: every day I surrender my heart to God. Start your day surrendering your heart to God. Surrender the center of your emotions. Be the Lord of my feelings Lord! The more you get closer to God, the more your heart will be filled with love. Because, God is love. The further you get away from God, the more fear you get into your heart.
JOB 11:13-18 “Surrender your heart to God, turn to Him in prayer, and give up your sins – even those you do in secret. Then you won’t be ashamed; you will be confident and fearless. Your troubles will go away like water beneath a bridge, and your darkest hour will be brighter than noon. Then you’ll rest safe and secure, filled with hope and emptied of worry!”
DOES ANYBODY WANT THAT?
II. EVERYDAY I REMEMBER: every day I remember the way God loves me. If you really feel the love that God has for you, you will surely offer love with somebody else around you. If you feel love by God, you’ll going to be loving. It is impossible to feel loved by God, and not offer love to others. So, I have to remind myself about what God thinks about me. Not what the world thinks about me, but what God thinks about me. This is what removes my fears. Four things that God thinks about you.
• I’m completely accepted by God – MYTH: “If I could just be perfect, then everybody would like me”. And “If I could just have million of dollars then my life would be happy”. Jesus was perfect, and a lot of people didn’t like Him. First, no matter who you are or what you do, somebody’s not going to like you. Now here’s the good news,
“YOU DON’T EVERYBODY’S APPROVAL TO BE HAPPY.” AND “YOU DON’T NEED TO WiN MILLION DOLLARS TO BE HAPPY.”
You can’t get everybody agree with you. Everybody is worrying about their approval ratings. Worrying about who will be my friends, because my enemy’s showing some happy photos with their friends on Facebook.
This issue of acceptance has already been settled by God.
TITUS 3:7 “Jesus made us acceptable to God”.
ROMANS 8:1 “There is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus!”
III. EVERYDAY I OFFER: I offer that same love to others.
JOHN 13:34 “I’m giving you a new commandment: Love each other in the same way that I have loved you.”
That’s not an option, that’s not a suggestion! If you’re a follower of Christ, you must love everybody!
Care for them, forgive them with the hurt they did to you.
I MUST ACCEPT EVERYBODY ELSE, THE WAY JESUS ACCEPTS ME.
I MUST FORGIVE EVERYBODY ELSE, THE WAY JESUS FORGIVE ME.
I MUST VALUE EVERYBODY ELSE, THE WAY JESUS VALUE ME.
HOW DO YOU MAKE THE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE REALLY FEEL LOVED BY YOU?
THE ANSWER IS:
1 COITNTHIANS 13:7 “Love never stops being patient, love never stops believing, love never stops hoping, love never gives up!”
If you want to be a great lover, you got to do this! Because this is what really love means. This is the kind of love that God has for you. And this is the kind of love that God wants you to offer with everybody else.
REAL LOVE DOES 4 THINGS:
• LOVE EXTENDS GRACE: IT NEVER STOPS BEING PATIENT!
• LOVE EXPRESSES FAITH: IT NEVER STOPS BELIEVEING!
• LOVE EXPECTS THE BEST: IT NEVER STOPS HOPING!
• LOVE ENDURES THE WORST: IT NEVER GIVES UP!
You can throw everything at me but I’m not going to stop loving you. You’ll not going to get the real love back if you always ask for conditions.
You needed this message today! And God has spoken to you through His Word!
If you want to transform your marriage follow this prayer:
I admit that I have made a mess in my relationships. They are complicated they are broken. They are not the best. And I they need transformation. And only you that I need, oh Lord. Your ways and not my own personal ways. help me God and only you that I will expect to change may relationship for the best. I’d like you God to begin by changing me. Not anybody else but me, Oh Lord! Amen!
