04/10/2026
HUMBLENESS and FORGIVENESS
🕊️ Humility (Anavah)
The Rambam treats humility not merely as one virtue among many, but as a disposition that requires an extreme, rather than a middle, path.
The General Principle of Moderation
In the Laws of Character Traits (Hilchot De‘ot), the Rambam establishes that for most traits, the “straight path” is the intermediate measure, equidistant from both extremes.
A person who balances all their dispositions is called “WISE”.
The Exception: Humility
However, humility is explicitly excluded from this rule. The Rambam writes:
“And there are dispositions that it is forbidden for a person to conduct himself in them in an intermediate way, but he must distance himself to the opposite extreme—and this is haughtiness, for the good path is not that a person be merely humble, but that he be very lowly of spirit, and his spirit be exceedingly low.
Therefore it is said about Moses our teacher, ‘very humble’ (Num 12:3), and it is not said merely humble.
Therefore the sages commanded: be very, very lowly of spirit.”
He further notes that “anyone whose heart is elevated denies the fundamental” and that “one who has arrogance is under ban, even if only a little”.
The Distinction Between “Wise” and “Pious”
In the previous chapter, the Rambam clarifies the difference between one who is merely humble and one who goes beyond the letter of the law:
“One who distances himself from haughtiness to the utmost extreme and becomes very lowly of spirit is called PIOUS; and this is the trait of piety.
And if he distances himself only to the middle and becomes humble, he is called WISE; and this is the trait of WISDOM.”
Thus, the Rambam’s ideal is not a balanced humility, but an extreme self-effacement that he associates with the pious of old.
🤝 Forgiveness (Mechilah)
The Rambam’s laws of forgiveness are situated within the Laws of Repentance (Hilchot Teshuvah), where he distinguishes between sins against God and sins against one’s fellow.
The Obligation to Seek Forgiveness
When one has wronged another person, the Rambam rules that repentance alone is insufficient.
The offender must actively appease the injured party:
“If his fellow did not want to forgive him—he brings [in front of] him a row of three people from among his friends, and they approach him and ask from him.
If he was not appeased by them, he brings a second and a third time.
If he did not want [to be appeased], he leaves him and goes; and the one who did not forgive is the sinner.
And if he was his teacher—he must go and come even a thousand times until he forgives him.”
The Prohibition Against Cruelty
Most striking is the Rambam’s condemnation of the person who refuses to forgive:
“Because it is forbidden for a person to be cruel and not to be appeased; rather he should be easy to appease and difficult to anger, and at the time that the sinner asks from him to forgive, he forgives with a complete heart and a willing soul; and even if he distressed him much and sinned to him much, he should not take revenge nor bear a grudge.
And this is the way of the seed of Israel, and their correct heart.”
He contrasts this with “the gentiles, uncircumcised of heart,” who “keep their wrath forever”.
Posthumous Forgiveness
If the injured party dies before the offender can ask forgiveness, the Rambam requires a public act of contrition:
“One who sinned to his fellow, and his fellow died before he asked from him forgiveness—he must bring ten people and stand them on his grave, and say before them:
I have sinned to the Lord God of Israel and to this so-and-so that I did to him such-and-such.”
📜 Summary
Virtue Rambam’s Core Teaching Source (mechon-mamre.org)
Humility One must not be merely humble but “very lowly of spirit,” going to the opposite extreme from haughtiness.
Laws of Character Traits 2:5
Forgiveness It is forbidden to be cruel and refuse to forgive; one must forgive with a complete heart and not bear a grudge.
Laws of Repentance 2:10
These passages show that for the Rambam, humility and forgiveness are not optional virtues but legal obligations.
Humility requires an extreme self-effacement that surpasses the ordinary path of moderation, while forgiveness demands that a person overcome the natural inclination to cruelty and revenge, embodying the “correct heart” of the seed of Israel.
האתר הזה מכיל את כל התנ"ך (תורה, נביאים, וכתובים), "משנה התורה" של הרמב"ם (התמצית השלמה שלו של כל התורה שבעל-פה), ועוד מקורות ההלכה. יחד, אלה נותנים את ההדרכה השלמה של הקדו....