08/02/2023
Good day to you all in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Below is the few story of a man of God who is passing through "hell on earth" in his marriage. He needs your counsel, advice or suggestions.
This man of God is someone I know very well.
His wife has not been obeying him since he married her for the past 15 years. His wife has not been giving him respect and honour he deserve even in the presence of their children and congregation. She doesn't listen or take correction or advice from her husband. Every house they have been renting, this woman do cause trouble that would expose her husband to ridicule, shame and disrespect. There was no house where she hasn't fight her husband and neighbours. This has been a sore pain in the heart of her husband because this and her other attitudes has caused demotion and delay for her husband in the marriage.
She has spoiled her husband several times by telling lies against him to her family, till extent that no one in her family try to listen and consider the pain this man of God is passing through. She has separated herself from her husband. She doesn't eat together with him anymore. She doesn't allow him to have s*x with her. In fact she cannot drink from the same cup her husband uses. In bed she always make sure there is gap between them. Sometimes she moved to the children room or passage or corridor to sleep whenever her husband wanted to have s*x with her. Whenever she wanted to receive calls or browse, she moved to the living room or children room or bathroom or outside. She reads messages/texts and delete them immediately. She doesn't allow her husband to use her phone. They don't study the word of God together neither pray together. She do curse her husband whenever there there is misunderstanding between them. She goes out and comes in the way she likes. Sometimes she would go for two, three, four, five days even one week without the knowledge of her husband. The man of God has seen some love messages/texts she shared with another men which she still used one way or the other to cover herself. There was a time when her husband saw a love message she replied to a man, he asked her but the woman furiously called the man, after some quarrelling and nagging with her husband, and asked him if anything s*x has happen between them, but her husband heard when the man said it is only hugging they've been doing. (She put the phone on speaker). This is the woman that has never willingly hug her husband since they've married. She has never willingly sit down on her husband's lap for one. I know them very well.i have lived with them. The man of God said it has always been a tog of war whenever she wanted to have s*x with her. She often lies down straight without any romance or kissing or hugging during s*xual in*******se. This man of God said his wife always closes her mouth whenever he wants to kiss her. This has been a severe pain in the heart of her husband which is reducing the man spiritually affecting the growth of the church. One thing I am so sure of is that this man of God so much loves his wife but his wife doesn't know this for him.
Now among what is happening right now is that God shown this man of God in a dream that his wife has committed atrocity (sleeping with another man) when they were not together for some years. And God told the man of God that without her confessing, there will be pollution in their ministry and home. The man of God asked his wife but there is no yes or no till today since 8 months. Whenever her husband asked her to let them pray over it if it had happened, she always fly up with trouble with him and said he shouldn't be asking him such questions again. Sometimes she replied him with a question "are you a saint, because you talks like a saint". She has made it a confusion to her husband, meanwhile our God is not a God of confusion. The reason why they were not together for some years before they came together last year is that the woman sent him away after arresting him with a police. She lied to her family and everyone then that her husband used to beat her. Whereas it was not true. What I knew that time was that it was very difficult for this man of God to feed his family and to pay house rent because he has some challenges in the ministry he works for through the troubles of his wife. And this would go for many days leaving the children with him without telling where she went to. And she was moving with some friends who are not having good home. One of them is in the third husband's house. One has gone with another man before he reconcile with her husband (this is the one that use to come to her and they would begin to discuss about men in the living room without regarding that the man of God is hearing in the room). There was a day when that woman called her side chick and give the man of God's wife the phone to greet him. And the side chick said he lines her voice on the phone and that he will like to meet with her, and she was smiling and replied that no problem,she also like to meet him someday. One of her friends then is not staying with her husband. Always moving from one place to another. The man of God's wife brought her home to stay with them. With all these, the man of God couldn't accommodate it again and telling his wife stop all these nonsense but instead she call all her family that her husband wanted to kill her. She was on her monthly period then and she used the blood to rob pants and her clothes and said her husband bears her to bleeding. And she arrested him with police. That's what caused separation, not divorce that time. All her family believes whatever she tells them just because they know her as born again before she married. They thought that's how she is still be. Now all what she's doing is pushing her husband to get divorce letter for her. The man of God now went to seek counsel from a a magistrate and woman asked him if they did registry/court wedding, which they did both court and church wedding. The woman said where are the certificates. He said they are with wife. The magistrate now said this is how the man of God will know if truly his wife wanted to leave him. She said he should go and ask for the certificates from his wife and tell her that they need it in the magistrate court to prepare the divorce letter. And said that if she released it, then her entire life life is no more with him. The man of God did as he was counselled. When he told his wife, she released the wedding certificates without any romus or reluctant. When the man of God showed the magistrate the certificate, she was marvelled and Said she might have have a man promising her heaven and earth somewhere, and that the man of God should be very careful so that she won't kill him. The problem there now is that this woman knows that the ministry where husband is working for as full timer is not allowing divorce. Once they divorce the ministry will sack her husband. She didn't think about the future of their children. This woman has no job yet. It is the man of God that carer for feeding, transportation and school fees of the children. The man of God is paying almost #200,000 for the school fees every term. And we all know what feeding is cost now in Nigeria. This is the woman that her husband supports her by financing her own ministry. But all efforts of the man of God to get her love and submission always fail. The man of God has prayed till extent that he is asking God to take him away when there is no positive changes in their marriage. Pls what shall the man of God do? We need your comments. The man of God is afraid of going back to zero level because of children, while his wife refuse to corporate.
That time when she sent her husband away, both husband and children were sleeping on the mountain for four months before help came for them. None of her family ready to listen or seeing to what the man of God is passing through because she has filled their heart with lies. Truly if you see her look you will say this is gentle woman. But people that close to her know who she is.
God bless you all for patiently reading to the end. You are free to share it.
