04/09/2019
*7 COMMON IGNORANCE AMONG CHRISTIAN SINGLES*
If you are still single, there are many things that may
attract you to a man or woman for marital relationship
which has nothing to do with marriage, but you may be
willfully ignorant of them. Here is the list of such
things:
TALENTS
When you see a brother who plays a musical instrument
very well or a young lady or man who has a good voice,
and you feel attracted to the person for marital
relationship, now what does singing or musical
instrument has to do with marriage? It is called *single
ignorance.* You may not realize this until you get into
marital relationship or you get married that you will
know that what attracted you to the person in the first
instance has nothing to do with having a successful
marriage at all!
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION
This is very funny, but to many singles out there, it is
not funny at all. It is rather a costly ignorance. When
you are attracted to a man because he knows how to
dress very well, or to a lady because she has straight
legs, because the person is tall, slim, light skinned, or
because the person has good set of teeth, long hair, or
a good smile, you are under the influence of common
singles' ignorance, because none of these things have
anything to do with having a good marriage.
If you go into marital relationship or get married
wrongly to a person because of physical attraction,
when the agony of bad marriage overwhelms you, you will
wish to use cutlass to cut off the straight legs or
whatever that lured you to the person.
PHYSICAL BEAUTY
In the book of Proverbs 31: 30, the Bible says, “Charm is
deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears
the LORD, she shall be praised.” If you are single and
you are still overwhelmed with single exorbitance, this
Bible verse will not make any sense to you. You will feel
like, “No o, beauty is something to me o. I want to
marry a beautiful woman, that is my longtime dream.”
Or “I want to marry a handsome man; in fact I can't
marry no other than that.” And you even quote Bible to
it that God gives good things to His children. You know
what? To the single, beauty is something or everything,
but to the married, beauty is nothing.
If you see a beautiful lady or a handsome young man,
and you are attracted to the person for marital
relationship, because of the beauty, you know what? You
are under the influence of single ignorance which will
soon clear from your eyes when you get into it.
Physical beauty has nothing to do with a good or happy
marriage. If physical beauty has anything to contribute
to happy marriage, why do celebrities have more divorce
rate? *Why do most men with beautiful wives still cheat
on their wives or abuse them physically or verbally?* It
is simply because physical beauty has nothing to do with
having a good marriage, and just as the Bible says in
Proverbs 31:30 that beauty is passing – meaning the
impression that the beauty of the person has on you will
later pass away in marriage and you will face the
reality.
FINANCIAL & MATERIAL INFLUENCE
If you marry somebody because the person is rich or have
a good job or business, after you get married, you then
realize that God already destined you to prosper on your
own without the person. Then you will wish you married
the right person and prospered together. When you
marry somebody because of their financial or material
influence, you will not have respect for the person and
you will not have rest of mind. Later you will realize
that you could have made it rich without the person,
that you could have married the poor right person and
made it together.
When you see a couple in a brand new latest SUV, and
they wear same design; When you see a couple spending
their vacation or summer in an expensive place outside
country, and you envy them and wish you have such
marriage, Ha! I pity you, You don't know that all those
things have nothing to do with happy home. Money,
materials and others have nothing to do with a good and
Godly home. For example, there is no amount of money
your husband may have that can console you when you
realize he is cheating on you.
If you are attracted to a lady because she has a good
job or a man because he has money and good car, it
means you have not known what marriage is all about.
Do you know that more rich people commit su***de than
the poor? Do you know that more wealthy couples divorce
than poor couples? Do you know that money does not
give joy and satisfaction in marriage? You may not
believe this until you get into it; this is a common
ignorance among the singles.
It is unfortunate that many singles are getting into
marriage with complete ignorance of the priorities of
marriage and with mistaken facts about marriage.
EDUCATION
Another common ignorance among singles in choosing a
partner in marriage is education. You want to marry,
and you have this idol of level of education in your heart
that the lady you want to marry must be educated or the
man you want to marry must not have lesser level of
education than you. When you ignore the perfect Will of
God for your life because he is not as educated as you
want or because her academic qualification is too low,
and you feel, “How will people feel that after all my
education I now marry this person with low academic
qualification.” Will it not sound well for people to hear
that the person you want to marry graduated from so-
so university, or s/he is a Dr, Lawyer, Engr. Etc.? You
know what? People you are trying to impress by marrying
a wrong 'educated' person will not be there with you in
the marriage when the tragedy of wrong marriage starts
to press on you.
TRIBE
Do you want to marry someone from a particular tribe or
you want to marry the perfect Will of God for your life?
Will it not be so painful that the heart-breaking wrong
person you marry is of same tribe with you or so
peaceful that the loving, Godly and right person you
marry is from another tribe? Which one is better for
you?
It is funny when I hear people say they must marry from
their tribe as if they have not seen the worst husbands
or wives from that tribe of theirs; as if marrying from
their tribe is more important than marrying in the Lord.
PARENTAL INFLUENCE
When you allow your parents to choose for you instead
of allowing God to choose for you or when you choose to
marry somebody because his or her parents are good or
Godly; If you go into marital relationship with somebody
because it is the wish of your parents or because the
parents of the person are ministers, popular, or
powerful in the society, such is called ignorance of the
singles. When you enter into the wrong marriage, your
parents or the parents of your spouse will not be there
with you.
THE ONLY RIGHT CHOICE
If you don't want to marry and mar your life, destiny,
ministry and eternity, but you want to marry and make
it in life, and make heaven, then the only person you can
marry and never regret is the person who is the Will of
God for you. God has created a person for you that fits
your life, destiny and God's program for you and that is
who is called the Will of God in marriage. If you miss the
right school, the right career or the right job, please do
not miss the right person God has created for you
because if you miss him/her, you may miss everything
including heaven.
HOW TO DISCOVER THE WILL OF GOD IN MARRIAGE
1. Surrender your life to Jesus. Only in Christ can you
have the Will of God when you are genuinely saved.
2. Surrender your will and ways to God. Let His Will be
your will and His Way be yours, no idol.
3. Seek Him for guidance. Lean not on your own
understanding
4. Settle for God's Perfect Will, not His permissive Will.
5. Stay pure till marriage. No premarital inordinate
affection or sexual immorality.
Here is the word of God – Isaiah 1:19, 20:
"If you are willing and obedient, You shall eat the good
of the land; But if you refuse and rebel, You shall be
devoured by the sword”; For the mouth of the LORD has
Spoken