22/07/2022
The way of life that other young men and I have chosen to follow places us where people expect us to have something to say on almost every social issue, and understandably so. I have said this because I am not an expert to comment on questions relating to boy-girlfriend relationship and its attendant indices. Be that as may, Iâm called upon today to say something concerning it.
The relationship between a man and a woman is exciting and beautiful, especially in its early phase. Only a few adjectives could describe how awesome it is in its early stage. Your world revolves around the one you love. You are often blinded to many things in its formative period â you see no faults or flaws. They become your world, and everything orients toward them. You call multiple times in a day â s(he) is usually the first person you call when you wake up and the last before you retire to bed. You are literally on every one of their social media accounts, namely Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, etc. â sending messages with an illuminating and infectious smile. You do âextra coolâ both during the day and night, yet that is not enough time.
Since I have stated already that no adjectives could adequately describe how beautiful relationships are in their infant beginning, I will not attempt to go on telling. Note that amidst the beauty, there is a flip side to it â and this is the side that makes others afraid of venturing into it. Indeed, everything you have ever loved about/in a relationship is on the other side of fear.
As time progresses, your once âMr. or Ms. Worldâ may begin to put on a weird attitude that you may see them as a small village. The laughter wanes, and calls that usually last forever could now be less than ten minutes. You call them a million times, but you wonât be answered. When they finally pick, do not expect an apology because you wonât get one. They may say things that get you confused, yet, when you seek clarification, you are called names and labeled âtroublesome.â Pray they do not find you on another call when they call. Otherwise, you may be called a cheat that is always on call with different men or women, as the case may be.
Consequently, your once source of happiness suddenly becomes a fountain of anguish to you, confusion sets in, you become mentally and physically drained, and you start disbelieving in love. They cheat on you but turn around and make you apologize instead. You donât matter anymore. Because they know that you love them and have made it known to them that you are desperate to keep the relationship, you become a dumping ground. You are guaranteed to hear stuff that will demoralize and hurt your feelings daily. They are usually not happy when they find no reason to inflict pain on you.
Your relationship becomes tinted with mood swings and quarrels. Like people taking preventive measures against the spread of COVID-19, they begin to create social distance in the relationship, and sooner than later, you begin to feel isolated. They go days without calling or replying to your calls and text messages, and if you donât call first, then forget it. They read your messages but deliberately refuse to reply to you. Yet, do the same to them and watch them bring hell on you. Because you love sincerely, you do not delay in replying their messages even though they do not do the same to you - They have your mumu button.
Now, let me reiterate this: all you have ever loved at the beginning of the relationship suddenly stands on the other side you ever feared.
It is vital to take cognizance of these thingsâevery relationship, at one point or the other, experiences this. A lot of people fall out, and understandably so. Even in your dream marriages, couples experience some, all, and even more of these things in their relationship. These issues test your love, commitment, patience, and every virtue possible. Some people are experiencing these things in their relationship currently; others will have a taste of it later.
Here is what you should know: love is not for the fainthearted. It comes with many possibilities. Let them who can accept this; otherwise, step aside and do not go near the never-ending drama called relationship.
Peace â
By: Kwaza Aondosoo
