28/04/2026
THE MOST EXPENSIVE RECONCILIATION IN BIBLICAL HISTORY.
The story of Absalom and his father David is one story everyone should read and learn from.
Not all forgiveness should lead to a reconciliation.
Forgive people, but understand that not everyone deserves access again.
Absalom was one of David's sons.
A very handsome young man, but dark at heart.
He killed his brother Amnon and ran away from town.
He hid in Geshur for years until Joab initiated a reconciliation process. Something he would later regret.
When you look at 2 Samuel chapter 14 verse 1 you'd realize that Joab was just trying to help.
Joab was David's right hand man. Apart from being his nephew, he was the leader of Israel's army.
He noticed that David was missing his son Absalom, and even though there's no record of David saying anything about it, Joab decided to bring back Absalom to David.
You shouldn't always follow your heart.
Allow your head to lead.
Because your heart can be wrong.
That you miss someone does not mean you should be with the person.
In fact, one of the ways trauma behaves is to create patterns and cause you to respond to them.
Trauma makes you want what hurts you.
At that point, you need to ignore your feelings and follow right judgement.
And it is worse if the person you are missing is handsome or beautiful.
See how the Bible described Absalom...
2 Samuel 14:25-26...
In all Israel there was not a man so highly praised for his handsome appearance as Absalom. From the top of his head to the sole of his foot there was no blemish in him.
26 Whenever he cut the hair of his head—he used to cut his hair once a year because it became too heavy for him—he would weigh it, and its weight was two hundred shekels[b] by the royal standard.
See fineness! Leader of the Beard gang association of fine men.
But his heart was desperately wicked.
No wonder the Bible says, "Know no man after the flesh".
Looks can be deceitful.
After Joab convinced the king to let him bring back Absalom to Jerusalem, and King David agreed, Absalom was brought back to the city of the King but never allowed to meet with the king.
Just like Absalom, there are so many people in the house of God who haven't met with God.
So it's dangerous to assume that because someone is around church, he/she is correct.
They may just be another Absalom.
After two years in Jerusalem without seeing the king, Absalom sent messengers to Joab, Joab knew that David wouldn't want to set eyes on him, so Joab ignored Absalom.
After three failed attempts to get Joab's attention, Absalom set Joab's field on fire.
Joab knew who was behind the fire, so he went to Absalom and asked him why he set his field on fire.
Absalom told him why he did that, and demanded that Joab takes him to see David.
See it here..
28. Absalom lived two years in Jerusalem without seeing the king’s face.
29 Then Absalom sent for Joab in order to send him to the king, but Joab refused to come to him. So he sent a second time, but he refused to come.
30 Then he said to his servants, “Look, Joab’s field is next to mine, and he has barley there. Go and set it on fire.” So Absalom’s servants set the field on fire.
31 Then Joab did go to Absalom’s house, and he said to him, “Why have your servants set my field on fire?”
32 Absalom said to Joab, “Look, I sent word to you and said, ‘Come here so I can send you to the king to ask, “Why have I come from Geshur? It would be better for me if I were still there!”’ Now then, I want to see the king’s face, and if I am guilty of anything, let him put me to death.”
Verse 33 is the reconciliation that should never have happened.
33 So Joab went to the king and told him this. Then the king summoned Absalom, and he came in and bowed down with his face to the ground before the king. And the king kissed Absalom.
Everything started going wrong after that reconciliation.
Absalom didn't desire to see the king because he was sorry for his deeds, he was just looking for an opportunity to be seen with the king so he could gain the trust of the people.
There are people in church, serving, worshipping, crying during worship, it's not about God, they want to deceive you.
They are looking for an opportunity.
Not all reconciliation is worth it.
They are not coming back to make amends, they are coming back to destroy you.
They are coming back to finish what they started.
When people show you who they are, believe them.
Stop kissing who you should be avoiding.
Be careful of false humility.
Don't let the bow of Absalom deceive you.
Absaloms bow with their knees but plots evil in their hearts.
If they were capable of causing the first trouble, they are capable of doing more harm.
Forgive, but don't grant access again.
Let them hang out in the city, don't bring them into your palace.
Guard your palace against Absalom.
Absalom's return was the beginning of disaster to David.
He lost his throne,
Was reduced to a fugitive,
Fled from his kingdom,
Lost his concubines,
Listen, you may not recover from the comeback destruction of Absalom, don't take them back.
To be continued....