10/08/2022
A stick to beat myself with
Jesus said, “Come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
But often I do not experience this. Is this a lie? Can this rest become another burden? Can this wonderful promise become another thing that I can beat myself with? I can come to God with my burdens and go away feeling worse than before because I do not find God’s rest. There must be something wrong with me. There must be some great sin in my life that means God won’t give me his rest.
I was pondering this the other day, wondering why so often I do not feel God’s rest, when a thought popped into my mind. Is the reason that I do not experience God's peace that I am not letting go of my burden? Physically there are only so many things I can carry before I start to break. Is this the same? Am I trying to carry so much stuff that when God offers me his peace, there is no room for it? After all, the bible does not say that God will just give us his peace. Psalm 55:22 says, “Cast your burden on the LORD, And He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.” I have to be active. I have to hand over our burdens, to throw them at Him.
The problem is, that is easier said than done. Sometimes I can grip those burdens so tightly that they cannot be prised out of my hands. Sometimes things play on my mind, going round and round, so that they are all I can think about. They seem to have a firm grip on me. How can I cast those things off?
The simple answer is, I don’t know. I don’t know how to get out of every situation, how to open my hands to release that burden or how to get something out of my mind that is going round and round, toying with me. I don’t know how to break that burden. I have some things that work for me. Sometimes. But I do not have a 3-step guide. I wish I did have. But I don’t.
But one thing I do believe. God wants to give me his rest. God does not want me to be burdened and weary. Time and time again we read, “Peace be with you.” That is God’s desire for us, to know Him and His peace and rest.
Perhaps the answer can be found in Jesus’ next statement. He carries on:
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Is that the answer? Am I wanting His peace and rest, but not wanting to take His yoke? Am I wanting all the good things He provides, but not wanting the not so easy bits? The necessity to take His yoke, to follow him closely. The necessity to admit that I do not know it all and that I must learn from Him?
The problem here is that I am giving myself a big stick to beat myself with. It is my fault I am not experiencing God's peace. It is all my fault. But the good thing is that I realise what is going on. And the better thing is that God is gracious. He sees my heart. He sees through my confusion and my faults. And that is enough. As he sees me struggling to understand, struggling to put things right, He reaches down in love and mercy and He takes away my burdens. As He sees me struggling to open my hands to release whatever is troubling me to Him, struggling to take His yoke, to align myself with Him, struggling to make sense of all that is rushing through my mind, He reaches out and sustains me.
So perhaps the next time I feel a massive weight on my shoulders perhaps I should not ask God for his peace. Perhaps I should ask him for help in handing over to him whatever is troubling me instead. And put down the big stick. Because when I have got rid of those 2 things I am more likely to be able to carry His peace.
