27/05/2026
๐ฅ๐ฒ๐ฐ๐๐ผ๐ฟ'๐ ๐๐น๐ผ๐ด - ๐๐ต๐๐ฟ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ช๐ถ๐๐ต๐ผ๐๐ ๐ช๐ฎ๐น๐น๐
๐ ๐๐ผ๐ผ๐ฑ ๐๐๐๐๐ผ๐บ๐ฒ๐ฟ ๐๐
๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ฟ๐ถ๐ฒ๐ป๐ฐ๐ฒ
Some months ago Lucy, our daughter, and I went out on an important mission. Motherโs Day was coming up and we wanted to get her mum a special gift to say โthank youโ for all that she does for us.
We went to our local shopping centre and, as we set about the task, a new shop caught my eye.
It was called โRitualsโ and, as I looked inside the door, I discovered it was full of skin and beauty products, and I wondered if this might be a good avenue for us to explore.
As Lucy is non-verbal, she is very responsive to sensory things and, as we entered the shop, it was very airy and spacious. There were lots of atmospheric lighting around the displays and a sales assistant at the door asked if he could help in any way.
I think I had that helpless appearance of a man who was in territory he wasnโt familiar with and, as I explained we were looking for a present, he made a few suggestions.
He then got another sales assistant to take us where we might find the things he had suggested. Lucy was in her wheelchair and the sales assistant couldnโt have been more helpful. With my permission, she took Lucy to a series of taps in the middle of the store and began applying different products to Lucyโs wrist inviting her to smell them. Lucy seemed to love them all, but there was one that made her smile every time it came near her nose.
We decided this was the one for her mum and they wrapped it in a special wrapping and made it look really nice. I thanked the girl for involving Lucy so inclusively in the process and taking such time and great care of us, and off we went with our purchase. When Motherโs Day came I was able to explain how Lucy had chosen the gift in a very particular way which made it extra special, and her mum absolutely loved what she had chosen.
About a month later, Lucy had taken part in a special needs dance competition and her school had won a prize. Her classroom assistant had coordinated the whole effort to get the team entered in this competition, and they had worked incredibly hard for months preparing this wonderful routine, which was one of the most joyful things we had ever seen. We thought about getting a little gift to say โthank youโ for such a special experience.
This time her mum and I came along and a different sales assistant saw Lucy coming and sought our permission to give her a hand massage. She loved the sensation and the smell of the cream involved, and we decided this was the gift for her classroom assistant. Just before we paid, the sales assistant pointed out there were a few other options for similar products and they were on special offer if we wanted to check them out.
We did check them out but, again, Lucyโs nose was tuned to the one she preferred. We did think it was lovely that we were shown options that were cheaper than the one Lucy chose, but we went with what she liked. The staff gave us a little cup of herbal tea which added to the loveliness of the experience.
Just a few weeks ago it was the birthday of a friend of Lucyโs, and we were back again. Each time there have been different assistants and, each time, they have showed us a range of options and totally involved Lucy in testing and sampling so we have been able to choose the thing she likes.
As a man who doesnโt often visit stores with beauty products, isnโt it amazing that Iโve been back three times in as many months? Each time we have found people who have endeavoured to make the experience special and totally inclusive of Lucy, who canโt speak and yet finds great happiness from all the sensory stimulation of the store, the lights, the smells, the water and the feel of these things on her skin.
Staff have never pressurised us to buy anything, but make us aware of things that might be on special offer. They have invited us to sign up to a newsletter which may entitle us to some discounts and offers from time to time. Twice they have offered us some herbal tea to make the shopping feel a bit more relaxed and pleasant and make us feel very welcome. They communicate that they are pleased we have visited their store, whether we have bought anything or not, as they are so knowledgeable and proud of the quality of the things they are selling.
In reflecting on these experiences and how positive they have felt, it got me thinking about the church. Sometimes we are overly reliant on our wonderful church wardens to do all the welcoming. If we see someone we donโt know come in, is there anything we could do to make their visit more memorable or positive?
Many years ago on a Sunday off, I came to the church where I now serve as rector. I had been out late the night before and, as time was running out after my shower, I hadnโt time to shave. It was a warm day and I wore my jeans and a tee shirt. As I slipped into the back pew before the service started, a lady who was sitting beside me welcomed me. She told me she hadnโt seen me before and she hoped I enjoyed the service.
She pointed out the rector at the front and told me he was a great speaker and I would enjoy what he had to say. She showed me where the hymn books and prayer books were in the seat and said, โIf you canโt follow whatโs going on Iโd be really happy to share mine with you and keep you right!โ
It gave me a sense that what was about to happen was really important. I loved the way she spoke about how much services meant to her and recognised that it might not be easy to follow for the uninitiated. Realistically, I probably looked quite scruffy and perhaps a bit intimidating as she had no clue who I was, but she was prepared to welcome me as I was and do all she could to help me have a great experience.
I have never forgotten the way she made me feel and it prompted the desire to return on other Sundays when I had a Sunday off.
Is our faith sufficiently important to us that we go beyond our comfort zone to invite others even if they might not be interested? Can we be gentle and welcoming and, at the same time, respectful that others might not share the same perspective on it as we do?
If we treat visitors with love and respect and welcome, yet give them the space they need to process all they are experiencing, thereโs quite a good chance they might want to return!
Much love to everyone,
Jono.
