23/03/2024
Many years ago, I was engaged to be married.
He had a sister & uncles living in lusaka but majority of His family were outside Lusaka. So some of them came in readiness for the marriage.
I got to spend alot of time with his immediate elder sister the days before the marriage...& we got close.
One day while we were out shopping in town, she had a strange look on her face. It seemed she had something to say but cudnt.
So I asked her what was wrong & she answered me with a question,
she was like, "r u pregnant? "
😳I was like "No"😂.
& then she said, "How well do u know my brother?"
I was like, " aaah, well enough I hope, we've been dating for 2yrs now".
she then said, "do u know about his kids?"
I was like, "yes, I've met the twins".
& thats when she said,
"I'm really sorry to do this to u, but after spending time with u, I think u r a sweet girl...& i just thought u shud know the truth.
I love my brother but he has issues with women. Those twins u met, their younger sibling who follows them is his as well. He also has 5 other kids with 4 different women...
A few months ago we went to pay damage for a lady who just gave birth...the baby is now 4months old.
We were all suprised to hear he's getting married wen we just went to pay damage for someone else.
if u have been with him for 2yrs, that means that last child we went to pay for was conceived while u were with him.
My brother has a total of 8kids & 5babymamas we know of...
If u still want to go thru with the marriage, thats fine, but I just wanted u to know first.
I have a daughter myself & I hope some day someone will care enough to warn her of danger she might not be aware of."
I went home & told my dad, he called the man & he admitted that indeed he had a number of kids he had been scared to tell me about. After further interrogation from my dad, we found out that I actually knew two of the baby mamas, one of them was his neighbour, the lady i got keys to his apartment from whenever i went over to clean while he was at work.
He wud leave his house keys with the neighbour & he wud tell me to get them from her. The neighbour was a single mom of 4 & That's when I realised that her 3year old looked alot like our man but I never noticed before🥺🥺🥺🥺.
I'm sure they used to laugh at me ati "ba cleaner stroke bo washa ma blanket ba laundry lady bazabwela bati pikile...give her the keys 🔑 when she comes"😫.
🌿🪷🌿🪷🌿🪷🌿🪷🌿🪷🌿🪷🌿🪷🌿🪷🌿
I was so conflicted because I had been engaged once before, nati people will now start laughing at me & I will get a reputation of always breaking off engagements. But my mother said to me, "better broken engagements mwanangu than broken marriages".
So thats how he & i parted ways.
Less than 6months later, he married a nurse who had just been transferred to the clinic in our area. While they were married, he got another girl pregnant from our neighborhood & the wife left. They later reconciled & shortly after he died suddenly. My mother went to his funeral & that's when a team of children even the wife & his family didn't know appeared. A legal battle now begun between the wife & the baby mamas over the house that was soley in his name & His car.
🌿🪻🌿🪻🌿🪻🌿🪻🌿🪻🌿🪻🌿🪻🌿🪻🌿
A few months back as i was meditating on the life i have lived, i remembered his sister & how i never thanked her for sticking her neck out for me.
Last year I begun looking for her, but I cudnt find her. I even tried searching for her on Facebook but I cudnt find her. I just wanted to thank her for the kindness she showed me many years ago.
🌿👭🌿🤼♀️🌿👭🌿🤼♀️🌿👭🌿🤼♀️🌿👭🌿🤼♀️🌿👭
I pray for a world where women protect each other, where we see each other as sisters & not rivals.
As in-laws, u don't have to always support your relative even when u see him hurting people.
If u can't convince him to change, u can atleast discretely protect innocent victims from falling prey.
🌿👭🌿👭🌿👭🌿👭🌿👭🌿👭🌿👭🌿👭🌿
& To the would be victims, don't throw someone who's just trying to help u under the bus. Get the information & investigate on your own.
To this day, that man went to his grave never knowing how I found out about his affairs & other children.
Author:
Plant Addict Diaries with Amake Fe
