08/23/2026
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WHAT SHOULD I WEAR AT CHURCH?
From our Churchwarden
Sally Tiredwell
Church Dress Codes (or Lack Thereof)
We are sometimes asked — usually in a slightly anxious voice — “What should I wear if I come to church?”
This question is almost always asked by people who have not yet noticed that St Faithful’s already resembles a small, slightly confused costume drama.
For example, our Senior Churchwarden, Perry Wainwright (and my mentor) often looks as though he has paused briefly on his way to go deer-stalking, wildfowling, or assisting Dr Watson with an urgent matter on Dartmoor. Tweed is involved. And boots capable of surviving a bog. One feels he could field-dress a pheasant at short notice.
By contrast, Mrs Sybil Rachett (or Rachett-Keen if you prefer) looks permanently ready to head off to Glastonbury at a moment’s notice. Layers. Colours. Textiles that have definitely known protest, possibly Greenham Common, and almost certainly rain. If there is a sudden need to form a human peace symbol in the nave, Sybil is prepared.
Our organist, Dr Lionel Hargreaves, dresses as though he is modelling for the “Distinguished Gentleman of a Certain Age” section of the Joe’s catalogue — though I am reliably informed that some items may, in fact, have been sourced from Temu. This does not affect the volume of his playing by a single decibel.
Our Verger, Alan Dobbs, looks immaculate until approximately eleven minutes into any service, at which point he resembles a man who has crawled through a hedge carrying a ladder and lost a quiet argument with gravity. This is usually on account of one of our Little Sheep doing something unspeakable to a hassock.
The clergy wear DRESSES, for goodness sake. Sometimes with alarming confidence. While I myself have been known to arrive looking as though I have dressed in the dark while running late. Which is because I HAVE.
And do you know what?
No one cares.
Truly.
So let me reassure you. At St Faithful’s, we operate a very simple dress code:
WE ARE JUST PLEASED YOU CAME. No one is keeping a clipboard at the door. No one is awarding marks for hems, collars, footwear, or seasonal appropriateness. No one will assume anything about your faith, politics, morals, or theological competence based on your jumper.
What matters is not what you are wearing on the outside.
What matters is what you bring with you on the inside —
your curiosity, your questions, your weariness, your hope, your grief, your joy, your uncertainty, your need to sit quietly at the back and see what happens.
If you come in a suit, wonderful.
If you come in jeans, wonderful.
If you come straight from work, from walking the dog, from wrestling children into shoes, or from deciding at the last possible moment that you might just give church another go — even better.
So please don’t let clothing put you off.
God has seen us all already.
And frankly, God has seen worse than whatever you are wearing.
You will be welcome.
So...see you tomorrow?
Sally Tiredwell, Churchwarden
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This article was previously published in Volume 1 of The Parish Life. It has been slightly modified in places where the Author thought he could be funnier. He was probably wrong.
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Enjoyed your visit to Havnot?
If you would like more parish life everything begins here: http://www.tomkennar.com
There you will find books, e-books, audiobook, merchandise and Substack, all gathered together in one alarming but useful place.
Print books are also available — in person only — from St Faith’s Charity Shop, 4 North Street, Havant.
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A final word about Artie Fischal.
Some readers have asked whether the stories are written by a real human being, especially because Facebook sometimes labels them “AI content”. For the avoidance of doubt, they are. The label appears because we use AI—known in Havnot as Artie Fischal—to create the illustrations that help our stories travel on Facebook.
Artie is our illustrator and occasional assistant. He is not our author. The ideas, characters and final words remain stubbornly human.
We trust that clarifies the matter.
Judith M. Crowther
Parish Administrator
