10/24/2026
I Find That Offensive
"See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many."
—Hebrews 12:15
We live in a world trying to outlaw offense. Laws are written, workplaces and speech policed, all so no one feels offended. Protect one group, another feels wounded. You can police language, but you cannot legislate a heart. Offense lives less in what is said than in what the hearer already carries in their heart.
Jesus warned, "Things that cause people to stumble are bound to come" (Luke 17:1). An offense-free life was never the promise. The question is not whether we will be touched, but what the touch exposes.
This is not only the world's problem. It is in the church. Leaders are offended when not honoured as they expect. Parishioners are offended by a sermon, a tone, a correction, or being overlooked. I have heard it so often it has become wearisome. But weariness is not the answer. Diagnosis is. When offense becomes a way of life, something deeper is at work.
Offense rarely begins with what was said. It begins with what was already there: pride demanding recognition, old rejection never healed, entitlement expecting gentle handling, and a need to be right. When a word or slight touches that tender place, the reaction is far bigger than the moment deserves. "A brother wronged is more unyielding than a fortified city" (Proverbs 18:19). The offended person does not just feel hurt. He builds a wall, locks the gate, and calls it protection.
Left alone, that wall becomes a root. A root is hidden, but it is not harmless. We rehearse the offense, retell the story, and recruit others to our side. Bitterness never stays private. It leaks into prayers, marriages, ministry, and church. Let anger sleep, and we give the enemy ground: "Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold." (Ephesians 4:26-27) Offense, nursed long enough, becomes an open door.
So test yourself before accusing others. Was this a real sin against me, or truth against my comfort? Was my worth attacked, or my idol exposed? If a brother truly sinned, "go and point out their fault, just between the two of you." (Matthew 18:15) Go privately for restoration, not an audience. If mainly pride was wounded, wisdom takes another road: "it is to one's glory to overlook an offense." (Proverbs 19:11) Overlooking is not pretending nothing happened; it is refusing to let a slight become a stronghold.
Humility helps. "Do not pay attention to every word people say" (Ecclesiastes 7:21). We too have spoken carelessly and needed grace. So be "quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry" (James 1:19). Slow anger is not weak faith; it is mature faith, giving the Holy Spirit room before our flesh answers.
Here is the root truth: offense is not proof you were wronged. It is proof something inside you was touched. Bring what is touched to God, not merely to others. Name it honestly: not only "They hurt me," but "Lord, I am proud. I wanted honour. I still carry an old wound. I want control." Venting rehearses the offense; repentance pulls up the root. Then forgiveness frees, for love "keeps no record of wrongs." (1 Corinthians 13:5) Forgiveness does not call wrong right. It releases the debt and refuses to let yesterday rule today. "Forgive as the Lord forgave you." (Colossians 3:13)
Friends, refuse to nurse what God wants to heal. Do not build your identity around being offended, and do not let a sermon, slight, or careless word rule your heart. Pull up the root, lay down the record, and let grace do what laws and policies never could: make you free inside, so no offense can make a home in you.
God Bless,
Tyrone