08/21/2021
"I am a registered nurse . . .
Nursing has been my entire life, a career lasting over fifteen years. I often tell people, I did not choose nursing, rather it chose me. I do not work as a nurse, I AM a nurse. I love my career and couldn’t imagine doing anything else . . .
I have been working in an acute care hospital in Olympia WA (the capital of Washington State) for five years. It is one of two hospitals in Olympia/Lacey/Tumwater area [with] a population of about 100,000 residents.
I work as a charge nurse in the intensive care unit (ICU), progressive care unit (PCU) and . . . I was highly involved in the integration and development of the Covid unit. At that time, I was both terrified, and excited. I was fully prepared to utilize my skills in efforts to combat the pandemic.
I wanted to be a part of this. I was honored to be able to serve in such a monumental time. We were prepared. We shut down the halls, designated Covid areas, developed protocols, brought in PPE, and then….we waited.
We waited for a long time for something that never came. The halls stayed empty. We were wasting resources staffing a Covid unit that never filled. We took the covid unit down. Things were starting to appear to be going back to normal. We were happy we did not become overwhelmed, as anticipated.
It is an odd virus. It affects everyone so differently. There are certainly some scary cases where patients are intubated with a ventilator and have multiple medications running - as fear portrays on the news - but this is rarely the case.
For the most part, patients are on room air, nasal cannula or high flow oxygen. The deaths, unfortunately, are mainly those suffering with comorbidities, such as diabetes, obesity, chronic lung disease and/or our elderly population with sensitive immune systems.
Sadly, this population suffers more severely with many diseases, not just Covid.
I have held the hand of patients as they pass from Covid because they are alone and their families cannot be there. It has been an impactful couple of years, but this is something us nurses do on a normal basis, pandemic or not.
There is no ice truck out back where we are throwing dead bodies. The morgue is empty. This week I had an elderly individual pass from Covid complications (American average life expectancy is 78 years old) and met the mortician assistant who was transporting the body. I asked her, “Have you guys seen a rapid increase in numbers at the morgue?”
Her reply, “No, not at all. In fact, my boyfriend also works for a local funeral service and he has seen more su***des than Covids as of late.”
You see, in the beginning, we treated Covid inappropriately. As with most severe acute respiratory failure, we intubated them (the breathing machine). We now know, high peep ventilation is associated with a higher mortality rate because the pressure can damage the lungs [though] many patients do require ventilation for survival and do very well. The medical staff are well prepared and trained to handle this.
Instead, we provide an alternative source of oxygen (high flow), encourage proning for 12 hours a day (laying on your belly) and have medications that successfully treat Covid, as well as some supplementation such as vitamin D and zinc . . .
This is going to be sensitive.
I think a lot of medical staff have felt a certain sense of empowerment/belonging, or automatic associations with a particular side, or feel compelled to belong to a particular side, and have used this pandemic as a sense of purpose. I feel it’s an over-exaggeration.
It’s not that bad.
Maybe, because I’m a tough as nails strong female who was raised by an ex-military single father, who has been nursing for over 15 years.
That’s just my opinion.
I think there is a lot of psychology happening here. And obviously, politics.
The benefits of what we have done do not outweigh the risks. Our rights, our children, school, businesses, mental health, economy, livelihood, su***de, depression, weakened immunity from social distancing, riots…all and more. The life of this country has been stripped from us. The joy is GONE.
This has gotten way out of control. My heart is heavy with grief over the loss. Not from Covid patients, but from the loss of joy. The loss of joy over mandating futile measures against a disease that do not work and does not reflect the situation at hand.
My employment is jeopardized [because I will not get vaccinated], my daughter will be forced to wear a mask in kindergarten and I believe we are well on our way to another lockdown. We all should know by now the negative harms of a lockdown.
What we have done will take generations to recover from.
Mother Nature will take her course, whether we like it or not. Herd immunity will be acquired but we will not eradicate this virus. It is respiratory and mutates much like many other viruses do. This is a normal and expected epidemiological process. We cannot hide from it.
I acknowledge there has been great loss from this disease. I am not disregarding the deaths or long term affects Covid has had, in small percentages, on this country. But —
Stop pointing fingers at the un-masked or the unvaccinated. Stop segregating us. Stop the hate. Stop the abuse. Stop the theatrics.
This is no ones fault.
This is extremely out of control.
And blown way out of proportion.
This is MY medical and clinical voice as a , who has been living and breathing the reality. I am entitled to it.
YOU are free to your own beliefs and interpretations of the events in which you have encountered.
The vaccine is available. Take it, if you want it. Don’t, if you do not. But dear God, let us live.
Freely."
— Amber Straub RN BSN CCRN
