09/07/2024
Embracing Change in Marriage:_ The Tree and Its Leaves (Song of Solomon 2:3)
Marriage is a beautiful journey, but it's not immune to the changes that life brings. Sometimes, these changes can be so subtle that we hardly notice them, until one day, we wake up and wonder, "What happened to us?" The truth is, change happened, and we failed to manage the new status quo.
Understanding the difference between the person and personality is crucial in navigating these changes. The person is the essence of who we are, our being, our soul. It's the core of our identity and existence (Psalm 139:14). Personality, on the other hand, is the way we express ourselves, interact with others, and navigate the world. Paul talks of how personality can leave us broke, wondering why and how we do what we don't want (Romans 7:15-18). It's like the leaves on a tree - they may change color, wither, or fall off, but the tree remains the same.
In marriage, it's essential to focus on the tree, not just the leaves. Don't let changes in personality or circumstances make you feel like a stranger to your partner. Embrace your growth, and remember that your spouse loves the real you, not a static image. You are still the same person they fell in love with, and that love can only continue to flourish as you grow and evolve together. Invest in nourishing the tree, and the leaves will be green again. Seasons may cause leaves to fall, but the tree remains steadfast (Matthew 7:25).
As a couple, strive to keep your love rooted in the tree (person) while working on keeping the leaves (personality) green. Be there for each other, and manage changes in personality together. Don't let the leaves change color and wither, only to regret it later when they're green again. Remember, your spouse didn't fall in love with a persona or a set of traits, but with the unique and authentic YOU. That love is strong enough to weather any storm (Proverbs 10:12). So, don't let changes make you feel like a foreign husband or wife to the one your spouse married. You are still the same wonderful individual, and your relationship is worth nurturing (Ephesians 5:25-27).
Let's pray: Dear Lord, help us to focus on the tree and not just the leaves. Help us to embrace change and grow together. Thank you for the love that binds us together. In Jesus' name, Amen.
