10/29/2022
Here's my zoom sermon
Good afternoon fellow students and clergy. Thank you for allowing me to guest talk on your daily zoom. Todays class assignment is about doing our personal sermon to share with you all a glimpse of our life that we our out here trying to live, to show God how much we appreciate the life he created in us. Becoming an Evangelist isn’t something that I planned. I went to college for an art degree and after I had my kid I decided to go back to school after I took the H&R Block tax classes which pushed me to go back and study Accounting which is weird because if you know me then you know I’m horrible at math in a sense. School felt great because it meant I could stay home with my then baby, who happens to be a grown 7 year old handful. I’ve always been fascinated by different religions and I love listening to Evangelists speak and dissect the bible and scriptures. My friend Jenn Mack and I used to say we were going to do tent revivals and use our smooth politician-like ways to sell Jesus and make lots of money in our future endeavors especially if we opened up a carnival for “carnie folks.” So accounting was coming along ok. I wasn’t too excited because math was horrible since I can answer equations just by looking and I had a hard time showing work so I was ready to just quit. I did like forensic math which sounds morbid but it’s interesting to see spending habits right before death. Then I was listening to the older JoeI Osteen , wasn’t yet a fan of the present Joel Osteen. I even would watch old Tammy Faye videos because she was an open supporter of the people who were shunned by the Christian world because of homosexuality, aids or anything that didn’t fit Society’s new normal. I did not enjoy Jim Bakker’s people evangelist tv show where he would always say “DONATE BECAUSE JESUS DOESN’T LOVE POOR PEOPLE,” and people fell for it even after the embezzlement. I didn’t like how he was the embodiment of the kind of Christian or Evangelist you don’t ever want to be. Make sure to watch THE EYES IF TAMMY FAYE and you will realize how her love was so great that not even her ex husband Jim with his scandals and cheating couldn’t bring her down or make her lose her faith in God. This movie will remind you why we all love Tammy Faye. So sitting there in the midst of accounting math I had an epiphany, a giant light bulb turned on in my brain and I heard my thoughts whispering to me to call my financial & student advisor and to let them know I was changing my major to Religion because I was going to be an Evangelist and Christian podcaster because that is what I felt my purpose was. Plus true crime podcasts helped me find evangelist podcasts. The next day I made the calls and had a few meetings because I was about to enter my junior year toward my bachelor’s in Accounting and my advisor wanted to make sure that I was sure because I would literally be throwing out the two years I had just completed and it would add 4 more years of Religion before I would graduate in 2024! They tried to reason with me but I was stubborn and refused to back down and so my new schedule of classes was registered and I felt a sense of happiness that I never knew existed because the only two other times that I felt that true joy in my heart was when I met someone who I will discuss in a bit and when I found out I was going to have a surprise baby, who is the one true love of my life even though Dezzy drives me nuts. So of course I was excited to go out and tell everyone about my new found career path. Little did I know that people look at religion through rose-colored glasses and sometimes the opinions are not always the best and are very judgmental. So for awhile after two people made horrible comments and said I was just wasting my time, I was kind of awkwardly scared to tell people what I was studying. Then someone told me the only thing that matters is my happiness in doing what I feel my purpose is and that people will always find something negative to say because they aren’t happy with themselves. So then I started being open. I found it hurt when friends and relatives were the ones who thought it was a dumb career move but the overwhelming support from perfect strangers helped me realize I’m not doing it for acceptance. I’m doing it to share the Word of God and to show everyone the awesomeness of God and what He will do for you when you put your faith in him. My first year I didn’t enjoy witnessing to strangers or family/ friends because people treat you like a l***r or if I had monkey pox. Like I just want to do what makes my heart happy. In a nutshell this is pretty much my daily life and now instead of arguing about religion or politics I simply tell them “Idk why you are angry but I’m not trying to sell you anything and Jesus loves you!” This reply literally will make them be quiet. I just want to share with you the important parts that put a smile on my face even when the day is long. This last year started out so fantastic. Like I moved and reconnected with a friend or person that is soo important to me even she doesn’t think I care. Actually life has been a downward spiral especially after I had back to back heart attacks in May. I’m recovering but still not where I hope to be. I let myself dig a hole that I put myself in and up until very recently like weeks ago my friend said things that resonated with me and made me step back and realize that I’m not always the victim that I was being a jerk and treating them horribly. I’m not proud of the person I was becoming but I’m working on being the best person I can be. I’m not sure about the future and if My friend will ever forgive me but I don’t give up easily and I’m willing to work on my issues. Sometimes I wish they could see themselves from my eyes because then they would see how I see them as the best person in my life. These are bits and pieces of the good things as well as the things that I struggle with because even though God made us in his likeness we are nowhere perfect like God but we can also be forgiving like Jesus when he tells us what to do with forgiveness and it says in “Matthew 18: 21-22 reads, Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” I fully never understood why Jesus would want us to knowingly forgive someone even if they slapped us 77 times. I will get back to explaining how the scripture correlates with my present life. So the last few months I can admit I wasn’t good to my friend and even though I treated them horribly ( like when Jesus says let them slap u 77 times and forgive) I thought that my friend was wrong because she wasn’t going to forgive me for the 39th time (just a guess could be more). I felt as if I were the hurt party when in reality I was interpreting the true meaning of Matthew 18:21-22. Instead of blaming my friend for not forgiving me 77 times, I realized that maybe I should stop hurting them over and over again. So that I could then understand and be worth of their true forgiveness. I sometimes forget that I’m a mess and that not everything is about me and I need to be more understanding and stop being hurtful and selfish. So this newfound epiphany of forgiveness came to me the other day when I talked to my counselor. Just so you know there is nothing wrong with getting help with your mental health. If you feel you need it please ask for help before it’s to late. We all need help at some point. So now that I’m realizing what I’ve done I’ve realized that sometimes you can’t fix it or talk your way out of it. All you can do is apologize and try to right the wrongs you have caused and you might even have to let go so that you don’t keep hurting them. They deserve to be happy and free from the hurt you bestowed upon them and yes I can honestly say it may always hurt but sometimes their happiness is what matters because we can’t be selfish and self- centered.. So just know fights with friends or people you love will happen because we are human and make mistakes. Take this advice and don’t Be like me and wait till it’s too late. Sometimes we meet someone who makes you forget everything and might even make u stutter ( I do stutter though) and you realize how you are meant to be in each other’s lives forever but just because it’s supposed to happen doesn’t mean it will unless you let yourself be just as open and vulnerable as they are with you. I hope this helped in explaining the scripture in Matthew 18:21-22 in real life examples. My other thing I try to tell people and I’m even working on it myself is to not say the most hurtful things in anger because you never know if that will be the last thing either of you hear or say. I’m working on everything because I seriously have lost my self and my way/path these last few months. I do know that my friend makes me want to be a better person even though I am not my best self right now. I’m able to admit my shameful actions and work in repairing them so that maybe forgiveness will be in my future.. So usually I wear a mouth guard so I don’t stutter because public speaking gets me nervous and I jumble my words but I noticed when I talk in front of people as an Evangelist my stuttering stops. There will be a suggestion box for feed back on our sermons and I hope you got something or anything from my personal sermon that may help you in your own journey. Don’t forget to leave any positive or negative feedback so that I can learn and become a better Evangelist. Thank you.
