Lifecycles with Rabbi Miller

Lifecycles with Rabbi Miller Let's work together to create a meaningful and memorable wedding, mitzvah, or baby naming.

10/11/2024

Wishing my Jewish family and friends a meaningful fast. In this new Year May you be written and sealed for blessing in the Book of Life.

Wishing everyone a Shanah Tovah, a sweet, happy and healthy New Year. (Thank you to Joanne Fink for her beautiful at tha...
10/02/2024

Wishing everyone a Shanah Tovah, a sweet, happy and healthy New Year. (Thank you to Joanne Fink for her beautiful at that both inspires and brings comfort.)

08/01/2024

Today is day
300

Should we throw candy at the end of a B'Mitzvah? In my humble opinion, NO!!!!!!! Now let me tell you why. There is no ...
12/22/2023

Should we throw candy at the end of a B'Mitzvah? In my humble opinion, NO!!!!!!! Now let me tell you why. There is no such thing as "soft" candy. Any candy being thrown overhand, by kids, in the back of the room becomes like a ball being pitched by a major league ball player. The B'Mitzvah could get hit in the eye (yes, there was once a scratched cornea and kid went to the emergency room and missed their party) or could get whacked in the head (yes, there was once a kid who had a red egg shaped lump on his forehead in every picture from being hit with "soft" candy) or your guests and clergy could get hit and hurt too. There are ways to work around this. One way is to have the first two rows of guest ONLY throw the candy and instruct them to throw it gently and underhand. Another is to have the candy in a bucket and have the siblings or a friend or two come forward and pour it over the B'Mitzvah. Or I had one family that threw bright color ribbon. There are so many ways we now shower our B'mitzvah kids with sweetness. Throwing candy, no longer needs to be one of them and no one wants to eat those Sunkist fruit gems.

What time should we start? This is an excellent question. Weddings ALWAYS start on time. B'Mitzvahs... not so such. I...
12/22/2023

What time should we start? This is an excellent question. Weddings ALWAYS start on time. B'Mitzvahs... not so such. It is customary to invite guests 15 minutes before the actual start time of the service. I am growing increasingly convinced that if you want to start at a particular time, you should invite guests for a half hour before. They never arrive right on time and families are always excited to greet their guests before the service starts.

Happy Hanukkah!!!
12/08/2023

Happy Hanukkah!!!

Is it worth the splurge? When planning your Bar or Bat Mitzvah there are so many things to consider. Is it worth it to...
10/17/2023

Is it worth the splurge? When planning your Bar or Bat Mitzvah there are so many things to consider. Is it worth it to splurge for decorations or the swag? Is it worth it to splurge on the food or the cake? After 25 years of and hundreds of mitzvahs, there is one thing that I would splurge on and that is the photographer. A good photographer will capture the emotion of the day, the look of pride in the parents eyes, the nerves and excitement of the mitzvah child, the fun exchange between siblings. A mitzvah is a milestone moment that families will look back on for years. I often hear about parents who show their children pictures of their special day. Your guest won't remember the decorations or the cake but with a professional photographer you and your family will be able to remember what an amazing day your family celebrated! (Thank you to Joy Yagid for her amazing pictures below.)

On this Kol Neidrei eve, may you be inscribed for blessing in the Book of Life and may your fast be a meaningful one.
09/24/2023

On this Kol Neidrei eve, may you be inscribed for blessing in the Book of Life and may your fast be a meaningful one.

Rosh Hashanah starts tonight. Wishing everyone a happy, healthy, and sweet New Year!
09/15/2023

Rosh Hashanah starts tonight. Wishing everyone a happy, healthy, and sweet New Year!

If you have little kids in your family that you love and adore, should you invite them to be a flower girl and ring bear...
07/16/2023

If you have little kids in your family that you love and adore, should you invite them to be a flower girl and ring bearer? This depends on a few things.

1. The age and maturity level of the kids. Will they be able to confidently walk down the aisle? Are they old enough to understand the importance of what they are doing? Will they enjoy this task? If the answer to these questions is yes-- include them!

2. Do the bride and groom care what happens with the flower girl and ring bearer? If at the last minute they can't make it down the aisle or if they go down crying or of their parents have to pick them up and carry them down-- will this matter to you? If you feel it will distract from the day- it is probably best not to include them.

3. Are they staying for the reception? Will this be an imposition on their parents? Even if they are being picked up after the cocktail hour, it is stressful for the parents of these little ones. The day includes a lot of standing around waiting for something to happen. There is a lot of waiting to be in pictures, then waiting for the ceremony. It is really hard (and boring) for the little ones. They may get restless, they will need a snack and maybe a nap. It will be hard on their parents. And could also be expensive since most parents will need to buy that special dress for a little girl and a tuxedo for a little boy. As much as you may love to have a flower girl and ring bearer, it might be nice for their parents to leave them home so the parents can enjoy your special day and be fully present.

The decision to include or not include little ones in the ceremony should be made well in advance of the ceremony. If anyone feels uncomfortable with the decision that is made, a conversation can take place and details can be worked out well before the wedding day. And once the decision is made- stick with it so no one is upset on the wedding day.

Do I need a wedding coordinator? While this is clearly a personal choice, there are a few factors that should go into th...
07/16/2023

Do I need a wedding coordinator?
While this is clearly a personal choice, there are a few factors that should go into this decision. Some venues have someone who will function in this role but it is important to ask if that person will be watching the time and keeping everyone on schedule. Will that person be dedicated to taking care of the needs of the couple or will they really be helping with set up, making them challenging to find when needs arise?

Having a coordinator gives the couple and their families and bridal party the freedom to relax knowing that someone else is managing all the details and keeping everyone on schedule. A coordinator is able to get someone from the venue to clear off a table so the ketubah and marriage license can be signed on a clean table the is picture ready.

So whether you hire an external coordinator or you have a top notch one from the venue, it is important to have someone who is making sure your big day runs smoothly and on time and the couple has everything they need in the moment when the need it.

I have reached 100 followers! Thank you for your continued support. I could not have done it without each of you. 🙏🤗🎉
06/29/2023

I have reached 100 followers! Thank you for your continued support. I could not have done it without each of you. 🙏🤗🎉

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