06/28/2022
We are not superheroes!
Well I was supposed to be working but here I am writing. We are not superheroes! Family vacation begins now AND WE NEED IT! So much has been going on in our lives for the past several years and to be quite honest it’s taken a toil on us. While we are exhausted, stressed, and maybe even a little depressed but nevertheless our relationship with our individual selves, each other, and our children have grown beautifully.
Let me tell you….WE BOTH STRUGGLE with the need for “perfection” and we are aware that it’s rooted in anxiety but let me tell you it’s just not worth it. Sometimes our expectations of everything and everyone are just too HIGH! There are moments when you put on that cape and then there are moments when you absolutely should take that cape off. When we first started dating we referred to each other as Lois Lane and Clark Kent…..but at some point we literally forgot to return to that. We kept on being Superman and Superwoman and that’s not good for anybody.
When we first got married, the house literally changed with the seasons. It was like the perfect movie set. You knew what time of the year it was because of the scents burning, the table settings and dish towels, and if that wasn’t enough throws, pillows, and shower curtains would tell it all! At this point, if you look hard enough you’ll find that we are still celebrating Christmas in JULY! Ha! Floors were once spotless now we stepping over Buzz Lightyear, Woody, drumsticks, clothes, and cars everywhere we go in the house. Again, let me tell you our feet were prepared to the gospel of peace, they were made of steel to carry the gospel of legos! Not only that but we both were much thinner and now we only talk about going to the gym. We eat out too often and we used to cook “e’ryday!” We are constantly on the go fulfilling duties and obligations. We have to smile just right at others, be overly pleasant, and constantly understanding and empathetic to others even when we those same standards aren’t reciprocated. Now that’s a job for superheroes and we just ain’t that!
Trust me, deep down inside we both have a need to make everything we do perfect but for what…We just ain’t superheroes! The capes are off! Nothing about us is going to be perfect…. AT ALL! We don’t make excuses AND now we realize that it’s OKAY!
But how do you cope with not wearing a cape when that’s all you’re used to wearing? The vulnerability can be MUCH to deal with. What you have to learn is the Clark Kent and Lois Lane is just as strong as the characters in capes, maybe even stronger. That means you and your spouse can handle all that your capes have been covering up. The real power in this is that once you learn how to cover your spouse they no longer feel the need for a cape. Do not allow a mask and cape to be responsible for covering what you were supposed to. Our advice to you is stop expecting and start covering!
We ain’t superheroes we just regular people….Clark Kent and Lois Lane.
