05/10/2021
I FAILED AGAIN... I SINNED AGAIN | Rev. Dr. Iniobong Udoh
This is a word for someone who has been struggling all week with a sense of guilt and failure. A few days back you fell again into a habit you hate and have longed to break away from.
You have come to really hate life and despise yourself. Aside the sighs and the emotional weight that you carry in your heart, the words you have spoken most is β βI failed again!β
You are battling with guilt that is made worse because you must keep a front and pretend all is well. You have to go into the kitchen when all you really want is to walk away to a far place. You have to take the microphone and minister, when you truly know you are a mess inside.
You failed. You disappointed the people around you (even though they are not aware), you disappointed yourself and God. And now, you want to just end it all. You want to just walk away and never return.
Pause for a minute. God has a specific word for you and your struggle.
Apostle Paul went through this very struggle and he was honest enough to lay it bare in the Bible for people like us who struggle through failure, depression and addiction. He said, he would take a decision never to commit a sin again and then he finds himself doing the very thing!
He was an Apostle β authentic one at that. He wrote more than half of the New Testament. He knew God, did exploits for God, yet he struggled withβ¦ (fear would not let me mention the things I have imagined this great man of God had his battle with).
Romans 7
[18] For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.
[19] For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.
[15] For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.
Can you feel the frustration in these words? Can you see a man at a breaking point with his struggles?
[24] O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?
We rarely have preachers who can be this plain honest about their personal failures! We struggle to keep a front. If Apostle Paul is crying out for deliverance, from his weakness, if despite that weakness God used him, then tell me why are you going to walk away from it all? Why?
You may have slept in the wrong bed, with the wrong person.
You may have visited the p**n site again. You may have broken your vow again.
You may have fallen for the ma********on desire again.
You may have smoked again, abused alcohol again, abused your spouse again. Yes you failed!
But that is not the end of the story.
That is not the end of the vision.
That is not the end of you!
There is a Chapter 8 in Romans! Paul got his victory. You will get yours. I cannot guarantee that this will be the last time you fail, but I can guarantee that if you faint not, if you donβt give up on yourself, God will bring you through this season and give you victory.
Look for someone you can confide in and talk over your issues. But donβt just talk, get someone to pray with you.
Despite your failures, God misses your act of worship. He is waiting. Call Him now!
