Ednah Kimani

20/06/2022

When I had trouble, it was good for me. It helped me to learn your commands. The rules that you have taught me are very valuable. They are more valuable to me than thousands of pieces of gold and silver.
Psalms 119:71‭-‬72

When I had trouble, it was good for me. It helped me to learn your commands. The rules that you have taught me are very valuable. They are more valuable to me than thousands of pieces of gold and silv

15/05/2022

Lord Jesus. Meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, Jesus.
From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, Jesus.

That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be chosen and I set aside, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be praised and I unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

— Rafael Cardinal Merry del Val (1865-1930)

02/05/2022

IMPOSTER SYNDROME.

Every high achieving person if they choose to be honest with themselves will admit to struggling with this syndrome. It's the feeling of not being good enough and feeling like a fraudster. Many men used by God in the bible felt it. I am particularly amazed by Gideon, even after receiving instructions from the angel of the Lord that he would be Israel's champion to deliver them from the Midianites, the imposter Syndrome kicked in. I am thinking to myself, seeing an angel face to face is enough motivation to jump up to the task, but no! Gideon wanted assurance, he was telling the angel he was the least likely to do the task, his clan was the least in the tribe of Manasseh. He went on and on, even fleecing to get total assurance.
Many times we struggle with this feeling of inadequacy We tell God, you shouldn't choose me, am too messed up, am a sinner per excellence, I hurt people, I can't speak too well, I can't maintain relationships, I am not temperate or modest, I can't keep a home, I don't make good decisions, I have this secret sin and on and on.
What to learn:
1. It's a good place to be at... That feeling of inadequacy makes you rely on God rather than your perfections. It's good so that we can testify, that it's surely the Lord working in you. What the gospel msg does, is it turns perfectionism and the need for affirmation upside down; to God receiving the glory at the top.
I remember.one time I was about to do something big (spiritual activity) and I remember talking to one of my mentors and telling him how I was feeling. So inadequate, people's opinions were crippling me and fear had the best of me. I hoped he would encourage me and tell me nice things like YOU CAN DO THIS! Ole wangu! Instead he told me, I am happy you are fearful, because then you will look nowhere else but to God. Jeso.
2. Alot of what you hear or tell yourself is mostly untrue. The devil is nobody's father, he doesn't come to play with anyone. His intentions are you live a defeated life. He will whisper and at times form alliances with some people and shout at you to weaken your heart, defeat your thoughts and dim your conscience. You have to really be determined to parallel your life with what God says about you... period! Otherwise, you will be among those that will be remembered for not finishing the race.
God loves you, he has forgiven you totally, he roots for you, he empowers you for tasks, he continues to live and work in you, he will not and cannot abandon you, he will send help from his throne etc You have to believe his word without wavering. Imposter Syndrome is a distraction from action.
How, then, do we disarm the power of Imposter Syndrome? I think 2 Corinthians 10:5 has one answer:

“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

Have a strengthened week!

24/04/2022

Deconstructed!
I remember one time in theology school we were studying Pneumatology (study of the Holy Spirit) taught by our good didaskalos ( teacher in Greek) Rev Rodgers Achieng ...we had this discussion group and a heated debate ensued. We were discussing how the Holy Spirit is a spirit and I remember one particular lady didn't like that notion. She believed that the Holy Spirit is a physical person with divine attributes and this belief was informed by the Bible language eg (Holy Spirit 'moved', 'spoke' etc). She believed that if H.S is a Spirit then he shouldn't have those human attributes... She was not aware of the anthropomorphic language used in scripture. I remember we laughed ( I was particularly amazed by her thinking). I remember one time she got so annoyed and stormed out of class.
Theology school can really deconstruct you or do other things like make you rebellious or adamant depending on your teachability.
I just realized many of us, I included daily need to be deconstructed. From our beliefs. We have formed beliefs based on things apart from the Bible. We have formed beliefs from our families, our papa G.O ( general overseer), prophets, churches ( those that use Holy Ghost instead of Holy spirit 😅, those that speak in tongues, those that consider themselves to be deep and dogmatic etc), but the truth is, due to our fallen nature we see things from a certain lens. It takes humility to let the B.I.B.L.E deconstruct us daily. We need to look at the life of Jesus and look at things from his lens. His love for the broken, the poor, the sinners, the self righteous, his enemies...Jesus really did some deconstruction. Everything about him was to deconstruct beliefs formed by fallen human systems. Love your enemies was one deconstruction!
Have a deconstructing week. Na please tusome Bible zaidi.

Noah Bunde my Bishop, I want to tag you here....(Lol)

17/04/2022

DOUBTING THOMAS
When Jesus rose from the dead, the disciples saw him but Thomas was not with them and therefore he asked to see Jesus for him to believe.
In my humble opinion, there was nothing wrong with Thomas because he symbolizes us all including the disciples who believed because they had seen.
Faith is a process and not a destination..No one, absolutely no one has perfect faith. No one has a masters or a PhD in faith. Faith is a process not a destination.
We live in times when people are questioning, we face things that actually make us doubt. Is God real? Am I even on course? Why aren't things working?
Today as we celebrate Christ's resurrection, don't be petrified that you probably are doubting like T Diddy (Thomas Didymus alias doubting Thomas)
As you walk through the valley of DOUBT, KEEP WALKING.
BTW later, Thomas died in India after he refused to recant his faith, pierced with a sword right across his body. He was not faithless, he was just being human like you and I....He doubted but he kept walking

08/04/2022

Judas betrays Jesus

Just as he was speaking, Judas, one of the Twelve, appeared. With him was a crowd armed with swords and clubs, sent from the chief priests, the teachers of the law, and the elders. Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: “The one I kiss is the man; arrest him and lead him away under guard.” Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, “Rabbi!” and kissed him. The men seized Jesus and arrested him.
Mark 14:43‭-‬46 NIV

04/03/2022

WHAT IS EASY
😊 Go through the motions and not connect with people
😊connect ourselves with people who look like, act like and have people with same beliefs and opinions around us
WHAT IS NOT EASY BUT NECESSARY
😍Is to do the opposite, to connect with people that aren't these things and love them as yourself....

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds,
Hebrews 10:23‭-‬24 NIV

21/02/2022

GOD RESTORES! Ps. 23: 3 He restoreth my soul: He guideth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake...
This theme of restoration has really been on my mind for a while. What does it mean God restores?
We all know that God is a good shepherd and as He is shepherding us, one of the thing He does is to restore us.
He restores our finances, health, our marriages, the joy of our salvation, relationships, time, etc
1. To be restored we must be correctly positioned in Christ.. “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing John 15:5.
It is in abiding in him like Mary at the feet of Jesus or John at the bossom of Jesus, that restoration flows. A person's fittest condition is when they are in daily connection and communion with God. You cannot be an occasional christian or a Sunday christian and expect restoration. One must decide to abide, to stay in God and there one will receive the gift of restoration. Do not wander....
2. God restores our souls indicates that God deals with our sin. He saves us from the dim religious practices, our desire for worldy pleasures, inconsistent actions, idle conversations etc. Every hour, minute and second he is saving us. You are not the same person you were yesterday because of God's restorative nature. Can you imagine?
3. God is love and he shows it by restoring us. There is nothing we can do about God's nature of love. It's just who he is, he can't stop loving us and restoring his people into an abundance of peace, joy, love, friendships, forgiveness etc.
Conclusion
The secret to get yourself restored is not to do it yourself. No sacraments or other religious practices can restore our souls. All we have to do is go before him in our broken, cold, fearful, hurt state and let Christ do it.
When the branch is connected to the stem, the sap flows!
May you experience God's restoration.... Amen

24/12/2021

How to care for a sinner:
This is always a tough one, who is not a sinner anyway?
Where is the place of church and discipline? Maybe this can help but feel free to add or subtract...
1. Begin with yourself....entering someone's brokeness can expose ours..Gal 6:1 keep watch of yourself, lest you be tempted.
Avoid using words like: I don't do that, how could they, I could never do that etc...these words are traps...
2. To the hardened sinner.. the one who refuses to admit or confess; please pray for them... You don't disregard or shun them.we hope that one day the light of Christ will shine in them..
3. To the one that repents fast... Interestingly, we don't like these ones very much.we like it when the ones who hurt us to hurt and hurt for long..it feels unfair to see them forgiven and free. When the one who has been caught in sin is forgiven and receives grace then we as the community of believers must also align to the grace extended. Punishment of the sinner is not an ever going thing... Paul pleads with the church in Corinth to forgive the man who was caught sleeping with his father's wife after his confession.
Paul tells them to forgive, comfort and reaffirm their love for the brother.
How we handle a repentant sinner is a spiritual warfare.. only the devil/Satan not God inflicts excess sorrow, removes love and neglects comfort...when we want to inflict excess sorrow, guess who we are serving?
Mostly we like the devilish approach and not the divine approach..
God help us, we are learning everyday...

14/12/2021

One of the hardest life decision is knowing whether to walk away or try harder!