The Red Gate Christian Ministries

10/09/2026

When “I Just Want to Ride” Becomes the Problem🔥

A trainer friend of mine recently lost it with a client. This bothered her enormously because she is normally incredibly patient. She is also kind, experienced and genuinely goes out of her way to help people.

The client was lovely too, and that matters. This isn't a story about a horrible person mistreating a horse. It's about a perfectly nice person who loved her horse, wanted to ride her horse and was struggling to see that some of the things standing between her and that goal weren't going to disappear simply because she really wanted to ride.

For a couple of months, my friend had been helping her with an anxious, spooky mare. Quite quickly, she noticed several things. The mare appeared mildly footsore. Boots were purchased, but my friend suspected more investigation was needed, including looking at diet and hoof care. The saddle had also never been properly fitted.

Then there was the riding. When the mare became anxious and rushed, the rider would shortened the reins and pulled harder on her mouth. On the ground, her handling of the lead rope was inadvertently creating confusion. Nothing malicious was happening. She simply didn't yet have the capability or insight to recognise how these interactions might feel from the horse's end of the rope.

So my friend went back to groundwork. Not because groundwork is some sacred spiritual practice, but because the woman needed to learn how to communicate with her horse. The mare was already showing some anxiety on the ground, and my friend wanted to help the owner develop the skills to guide and support her there before adding the complexity of riding. The groundwork wasn't really about groundwork. It was about helping the human become clearer, more reliable and more capable of guiding the horse when things became difficult.

Each lesson, my friend explained what they were doing and why. She demonstrated, coached and gave the woman things to practise. Unfortunately, very little was practised, so they kept returning to much the same place. This wasn't a case of a trainer endlessly insisting on groundwork while refusing to let someone progress. The things preventing that progression weren't changing. The mare was still showing some anxiety on the ground, the owner's handling wasn't improving because she wasn't practising, the feet remained questionable and the saddle remained unchecked. They couldn't progress simply because time had passed when the problems they were trying to resolve were still sitting there waiting for someone to resolve them.

Then one day the client announced that she was sick of groundwork. She wanted to ride.🤨

Somewhere inside my friend's normally well-regulated nervous system, a small fuse finally reached the explosives.💥

Because the groundwork wasn't preventing her from riding. A collection of unresolved problems affecting the horse was.

The horse's feet were uncomfortable. The saddle hadn't been assessed. The owner still struggled to guide the mare clearly, and when the mare became worried under saddle, the response was to restrict her further. Getting on and riding wasn't going to magically make any of that disappear.😑

In fact, it potentially bundled all the problems together and added a human.

This is the part of the story worth committing to your memory banks.

When we describe a horse as anxious, spooky, reluctant, resistant or lacking confidence, we are describing what the situation looks like from our side. We still need to ask what the situation might look and feel like from theirs.

Perhaps the horse isn't simply anxious about the world. Perhaps she is anxious about experiencing the world while her feet hurt. Perhaps she is reluctant because the saddle is uncomfortable. Perhaps every time she becomes worried, the human shortens the reins and increases the pressure. Perhaps she doesn't feel particularly secure with the person handling her because that person is still learning how to communicate clearly.

Then we climb aboard and wonder why the horse isn't confident.😑

Determination is a wonderful human quality, but it has limitations. You cannot out-determination sore feet. You cannot positive-think a poorly fitting saddle into fitting. You cannot repeatedly confuse a horse and overcome the consequences by deciding that today you are definitely going for a ride.😑

My friend eventually lost her temper. She wishes she hadn't, but I understand why she did. Perhaps a boundary could have been established earlier, but hindsight is wonderfully articulate. She had spent weeks trying to help someone understand what she believed the horse was experiencing, and eventually her frustration got the better of her.😕

There is a useful warning here for all of us. Horses don't experience our good intentions. They experience what actually happens to them.

You can adore your horse and still accidentally make their life difficult. That doesn't make you a bad horse owner. It gives you something to investigate, learn or change.

The problem begins when the horse keeps providing information and we decide we don't want to hear it because it interferes with what WE want to do.

So perhaps the uncomfortable question is this: do I want to solve the problem my horse is experiencing, or do I just want my horse to stop having a problem with what I want to do⁉️

Because there comes a point where saddling up and getting on is no longer perseverance. If the horse is uncomfortable, the equipment is questionable, the communication is unclear and the horse keeps struggling, but we choose to ride anyway because riding is what WE want to do, perhaps we need to stop calling that determination.

At some point, refusing to listen to the horse in front of us becomes disregard for their experience.

And surely, if WE genuinely care about horses, that should matter more than whether we get to ride today.❤

Collectable Advice 289/365

Please SHARE this one, especially with the coaches and equine professionals who have found themselves in this exact situation. I suspect many of you will read this story and think, “Yep. I’ve lived this moment too.” Sometimes the hardest part of helping the horse is helping the human see what the horse has been trying to tell them.🥹

PS. I am looking forward to Project Reboot ❤

31/08/2026

Some people buy a horse, decide it isn’t exactly what they wanted, sell it, buy another… change disciplines, change trainers, change horses—and repeat the cycle.

Others get what they get and say, “Okay. Now let’s build.”

Every horse has strengths. Every horse has weaknesses. Every horse is going to have quirks, holes in their training, different ways of going, different buttons, different needs, and things that simply don’t fit your personal style right away.

The horse you buy might be incredibly talented, well-trained, and exactly what you were looking for—and you’ll still have to put the miles on.

You have to learn each other:
Build the confidence.
Develop the buttons.
Fine-tune the way they move.
Teach them how you communicate.
Figure out what makes them better.
And eventually make that horse fit you, not just the job you bought them for.

No horse is ever going to be 100% perfect. No horse is going to come completely finished for YOU. And if you spend your life chasing the next horse every time something isn’t exactly how you imagined it, you’ll spend a lot of money buying potential without ever putting in the work to develop it.

There’s a difference between buying horses and building horses.

One requires a checkbook.

The other requires time, patience, consistency, humility, creativity, and a willingness to work through the imperfections instead of immediately looking for something better.

Sometimes the horse you want isn’t the horse you find.

Sometimes you have to take the horse you believe in and build the horse you want.

Because eventually, the goal isn’t to own someone else’s finished product.

It’s to create something that is YOURS🤍

29/06/2026

The Quiet Thief of Confidence😒

After writing about disconnection yesterday, I received even more insight and another important word came up.

Discouragement.

Over the years, I've noticed that many people don't lose interest in their horses because they stop caring. In fact, they often care deeply. They desperately want to improve, enjoy their horse and become a better rider or handler.

What slowly wears them down is discouragement.

Interestingly, I don't think discouragement is usually caused by the horse.

It is caused by the story we tell ourselves about what happened with the horse.

The horse offers information.

We create the interpretation.

"I'm getting it wrong."

"I'm not good enough."

"We're never going to get there."

"My horse doesn't enjoy being with me."

Those thoughts feel incredibly real, but they are interpretations, not facts. When we believe them, they influence how we feel, the decisions we make and ultimately what happens next.

This is where I think connection to others becomes incredibly important.

When we are connected to good people, experienced coaches, thoughtful friends or a supportive community, we are no longer relying solely on the voice inside our own head. Instead, we begin to calibrate our thinking.

That is one of the most valuable things a good coach can provide.

Not simply instruction.

Interpretation.

A good coach doesn't just tell you what to do. They help you understand what you're seeing.

Instead of, "You're doing it wrong."

They might say, "Your horse lost balance there."

Instead of, "You're hopeless."

They might say, "Your timing was just a little late."

Instead of, "You've gone backwards."

They might say, "We've just uncovered the next thing to work on."

Nothing about the horse has changed.

What has changed is your understanding.

That understanding creates hope because it provides a pathway forward.

Over the years, I've realised that one of the most valuable things I can offer people isn't encouragement for the sake of encouragement. It is helping them see behaviour as information. Information isn't something to fear or judge. It is feedback that helps us make better decisions about what to do next.

That applies to horses.

It also applies to ourselves.

Perhaps this is why discouragement and disconnection are so closely related. When we become isolated with our own thoughts, our inner critic often becomes the loudest voice in the room. Left unchecked, that voice can convince us that one difficult ride, one setback or one mistake says something about who we are.

But when we stay connected to good people, people who are grounded, knowledgeable and genuinely want us to succeed, we gain access to better ways of thinking. We begin to calibrate our own thinking against reality rather than against fear, frustration or self-doubt. They remind us that progress is rarely linear, that setbacks are part of learning and that every behaviour, whether it comes from our horse or from ourselves, is simply information.

A good coach doesn't replace your thinking.

They help you calibrate it.

A good village does the same.

Eventually, those grounded voices become your own. Instead of hearing, "I'm hopeless," you find yourself saying, "That's interesting. What is my horse telling me? What can I do to help with that?"

To me, that is one of the greatest gifts of learning.

Not becoming dependent on someone else's voice.

Developing a better one of your own.

Shout out to Queenslanders, I am delivering my last Confidence Connection Workshop on the Gold Coast on the 14 August 2026. Let me help you recalibrate your thinking on this topic ❤ Info in comments.

Collectable Advice 245/365. Please hit SHARE or SAVE to spread good ideas ❤

Beautiful Image 📸 by Lynn Jenkin ❤

24/06/2026

Why are intermediate riders so difficult to cater for?

Here at Sundance Ranch, we have always offered options for beginners and experienced riders. We have only recently been able to consider opening some opportunities for intermediate riders. Why did it take so long for us to have something for intermediates?

With beginners it's easy- everything is kept slow and low risk. Even our greenest horses are capable of packing a beginner around independently in walk within the safety of the arena, trotting on the lunge or pottering along a narrow forest trail, blocked from going any faster by the horse in front. Getting out of the bath is more risky.
With experienced riders it's also pretty easy- if jumping higher than a can of Pepsi is (or at some point was!)no big deal, galloping is fun rather terrifying, maybe you've started a few youngsters or ridden your fair share of fire breathing dragons; you're gonna have no trouble staying in the plate in a big ole western saddle and won't be intimidated by straight forward horses that are not exactly school masters, but know their job well enough not to buck, spook or pull nasty surprises. You're not gonna be phased if the canter is more energetic or less comfortable to sit than your horse at home or if the horse jumps over a puddle rather than steps over it. Basically, beginners and experienced riders can ride every single one of our horses without problems. The beginner is not going to do anything exciting enough to razz the horse up and the experienced rider will revel in it if the horse gets razzed up!

To carry an intermediate rider requires much more specific skills from a horse. They need to be awake enough to respond to the aids promptly, but forgiving enough to ignore the inevitable mistakes that are made when learning. They need enough get up and go so that riders never learn to kick or pull, or to continue cantering or jumping in order for the rider to develop some rhythm and learn how it feels, but not so much go that they use any mistake the rider makes as an excuse to go faster. They need to be emotionally stable enough to not be affected by rider nerves, but not so "shut up I got this" that they ignore the rider all together. It takes years to get a horse to this point and not all of them are cut out for it. This doesn't even take into account that people consider themselves intermediate when they've just started cantering off the lunge line, but can also be someone who has done everything from dressage to jumping to western clinics but only ever ridden 3 horses in that time. The intermediate range in skill is enormous and therefore, the range of mistakes the horses need to be prepared to handle is also enormous.

In short, after 6 years of hard work, we've only just got to a point where our original set of young green horses are now either in their prime or middle aged and have acquired the necessary experience and attitude required to carry multiple riders of varying abilities and retain their base level of training. The majority of privately owned horses never reach this point and for that reason, these horses are rare diamonds that are worth their weight in gold.

22/06/2026

The Message Beneath the Message

When someone says, "I love you," do you simply hear the words and accept them as truth?

Of course you don't.

You immediately become a detective.

You study their face. You notice their posture. You listen carefully to the tone of their voice. You analyse the timing, the context, and perhaps even what happened three Tuesdays ago that might make this declaration suspicious.🧐

Because words, on their own, are never the whole story.

The person could be sincere.

They could be joking.

They could be being sarcastic.

They could be trying to manipulate you.

The point is that even when communication is delivered in the clearest language imaginable, we instinctively search for additional information. We look for clues about emotion, intent, confidence, sincerity, and trustworthiness.

We are constantly asking ourselves:

*"Do I believe this?"*

*"Does this feel safe?"*

*"What is really going on here?"*

Now consider the horse.

Unlike us, horses do not have the luxury of spoken language. They don't get a helpful running commentary explaining our intentions.

Imagine someone invited you to leave your friends and go for a walk with them.

Sounds harmless enough.

But what if you noticed they seemed hesitant? Uncertain? Nervous?

What if something about them felt off?

Would you feel motivated to follow them?

Or would you find yourself wondering why this slightly suspicious individual wanted you to leave the safety of your group?

You might politely decline.

Or, if you're a horse, you might plant your feet, look the other way, and suddenly develop a keen interest in a patch of grass.

Now imagine that same person wanted you to walk down a bush track.

As you looked at them, you could sense they were worried about something. Their body was tense. Their movements were uncertain. They seem far from confident.🤨

Would that make you feel safer?

Probably not.

In fact, their anxiety would likely become part of your decision-making process.

You might start wondering whether there was something down that track worth worrying about.

After all, if the person supposedly in charge doesn't seem convinced this is a good idea, why should you be?😎

This is one of the reasons horses can become difficult, resistant, spooky, or reluctant seemingly out of nowhere.

Often, we become so focused on the behaviour that we forget to examine what we might be bringing to the interaction ourselves.

Not just the signals we intentionally give.

The signals we unintentionally leak.

Our frustration.

Our uncertainty.

Our tension.

Our impatience.

Our lack of commitment to the decision we've made.

These things don't remain neatly contained inside us. They spill out into our posture, timing, movement, breathing, and handling.

They become part of the conversation.

And horses, being experts at reading behaviour rather than listening to speeches, pay close attention.

The next time your horse seems difficult, pause before assuming they are being stubborn or challenging.

Ask yourself a different question.

What emotions and intentions might this horse be feeling pouring out of me right now?

What have I wrapped around my communication?

Because communication is never just what we say.

It's everything else that comes with it.

And sometimes, when we look at our horse's behaviour through that lens, what once looked like defiance starts to look a lot more like feedback.❤

Collectable Advice 241/365. Hit SHAVE or SAVE. Please no copy and pasting 🙏

16/06/2026

I know I’ve been a bit quiet here at The Red Gate for the past six months, but I promise I haven’t gone out to pasture! 🐴
While I’ve been busy establishing my new boutique BnB “The Little House” and launching its social page over at .on.the.hill, I’ve still been quietly hustling in the professional horse world!
The 2025–26 season was a wild ride of fuel prices, budget squeezes, and more event cancellations than I care to count right across the board.
But, thanks to an incredible community, we still achieved some massive highlights:
🌵 Studied under American judge Bozo Rogers at the RHAA seminar (plus knocked out multiple webinars!).
🌵 Judged 6 full days across 4 fantastic clubs (and poured one out for the 4 days that got cancelled!).
🌵 Taught and rode in clinics across Victoria, and competed from regional events all the way up to Nationals.

Looking ahead:
The 🗓️ calendar is officially OPEN for next season’s clinics and judging panels!
If your club or private riding group is locking in dates, drop my name in the suggestion box (or tag them below).

🔥 EXCLUSIVE OPPORTUNITY:
I am offering exactly ONE spot for private mentoring for the upcoming season. If you want to fast-track your horsemanship with dedicated, 1-on-1 guidance, stay tuned—details are dropping soon.

Drop a comment below if you survived the 2025-26 season chaos with me! 👇

20/05/2026

Your horse doesn’t need perfection from you.

They need clarity.
Consistency.
And somewhere safe to search for the right answer.

Some of the best training happens in the quiet moments nobody posts online.

15/05/2026

13/05/2026

A Rant: The “He Doesn’t Do Much” Delusion🔥

There’s a very frustrating belief in the horse world that once a horse becomes “just a trail horse” or gets ridden once every blue moon, they somehow no longer require maintenance, management, or physical support.

Apparently arthritis is deeply respectful of low-level recreational activities and simply stops being an issue.🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

Performance horse? Joint injections, corrective shoeing, saddle fits, rehab plans, bodywork, supplements, carefully monitored workloads.

But...Twenty-two-year-old trail horse Jimmy, with the mobility of a rickety wheelbarrow, who gets dragged out of the paddock once a fortnight to carry hubby Trevor through the state forest?

“He doesn’t do much.”🤯

Exactly.
That’s the issue.

This is where I once again pull out the Worry Cup metaphor to explain why. Every horse has a capacity to cope with stress, discomfort, uncertainty, pressure, and life in general. The fuller the cup becomes, the less capacity the horse has to stay calm, think clearly, and tolerate being ridden without their behaviour spiralling into meltdown mode.

And one of the fastest ways to fill that cup is pain.

Sore feet. Arthritic joints. Weakness. Stiffness. Inflammation. Poor fitness. The sort of body discomfort that makes movement feel less like “light exercise” and more like "arduous hard work".

Movement becomes STRESSFUL when movement HURTS.💥

Then humans act shocked when the horse becomes reactive, tense, resistant, spooky, or “naughty.”

No.
The horse is physically REELING, and the risk of riders falling skyrockets.📈

And from a safety perspective, this matters enormously. The horse ridden “only occasionally” is often the horse with the least conditioning, the least strength, and the fullest Worry Cup. You are climbing aboard an uncomfortable, under-prepared animal and hoping for emotional stability, good decision-making, and a lovely calm ride.😎

That’s not horsemanship.
That’s not understanding what drives horse behaviour.😎

And honestly, more equine professionals need to help me out and stop reinforcing this myth. We need to stop telling people that because a horse “doesn’t do much,” that you can cut the support to them. Often these horses need *MORE* support because they lack the fitness, mobility, and resilience that help bodies cope with carrying riders.❗️

Less work does not magically make discomfort easier to tolerate.

That is not how bodies work.

Ask literally anyone over forty.😆

As someone with arthritis myself, I can assure you that having a few weeks off does not transform me into a majestic woodland athlete. It turns me into a packet of uncooked spaghetti held together by anti-inflammatories and heat rubs.

So if you want a horse that feels safer, calmer, and more capable of coping under saddle, management matters. Comfort matters. Welfare matters.

And ironically, the less your horse does, the more important that becomes.❤

Collectable Advice 212/365. If this gave you insight hit share or save. Please no copy and pasting🙂